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Alcohol, or my 9mm both looked pretty tasty last night. I didn't do either. However being sober really sucks some times. I've been trying to lose myself working out, even helping others. I just feel like I'm faking happiness at this point.

I don't want to get into it, but my life for the last 20 years is now gone. My only choices are to be destroyed or rise above. However when all I see is sadness and pain ahead of me. It's getting hard to keep it up.

Going to the gym. Might as well leave a good looking corpse ha!

Alcohol, or my 9mm both looked pretty tasty last night. I didn't do either. However being sober really sucks some times. I've been trying to lose myself working out, even helping others. I just feel like I'm faking happiness at this point. I don't want to get into it, but my life for the last 20 years is now gone. My only choices are to be destroyed or rise above. However when all I see is sadness and pain ahead of me. It's getting hard to keep it up. Going to the gym. Might as well leave a good looking corpse ha!

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[–] • 1 pt

You went to the wrong church. There have always been grifters. Books of Jude and 1 John are all about avoiding them. You might do better with an orthodox church, Greek or Russian. Might not be easy on the drinking side, but with God in your life, you might be able to moderate.