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Alcohol, or my 9mm both looked pretty tasty last night. I didn't do either. However being sober really sucks some times. I've been trying to lose myself working out, even helping others. I just feel like I'm faking happiness at this point.

I don't want to get into it, but my life for the last 20 years is now gone. My only choices are to be destroyed or rise above. However when all I see is sadness and pain ahead of me. It's getting hard to keep it up.

Going to the gym. Might as well leave a good looking corpse ha!

Alcohol, or my 9mm both looked pretty tasty last night. I didn't do either. However being sober really sucks some times. I've been trying to lose myself working out, even helping others. I just feel like I'm faking happiness at this point. I don't want to get into it, but my life for the last 20 years is now gone. My only choices are to be destroyed or rise above. However when all I see is sadness and pain ahead of me. It's getting hard to keep it up. Going to the gym. Might as well leave a good looking corpse ha!

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[–] • 1 pt

Ever heard that old saying fake it till you make it... Well It doesnt apply in the way people really use it...

It does apply to oneself in a negative way though. Put on the false happy face, and pretending for the sake of others, you will be miserable, realizing how unhappy you are.

Put on the normal face, and just be. then when something or someone makes you genuinely smile, savor that and find ways to do more of it.

You've got to want to be happy for you at the end of the day. Settle at first, for not being unhappy.