Kathy Griffin Says Something Funny – Urges Fans to See Her Before She Ends Up in Trump Internment Camp

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Part 1. The Arrival.

The white driverless Tesla "Electric Paddy Wagon" pulled up to the receiving hatch and push up gently against it. A metallic chunk as grabbers attached to the bars on it's back, pulling the van tight against the rubber seal. Doors opened with a soft hiss, and a single figure was pushed into the receiving cage by the ejector panel in the van. A belt pulled the figure forward, just clearing a metal grate that slammed down.

The figure turned to see the van's doors close before it silently drove away, ready to capture it's next social justice warrior.

A slatternly woman stood in the dark cage, a small mount of light filtering in from a hole far above. Matted red hair and dark circles adorned it face as it took in the cramped surroundings. Just as she thought she had her balance back after the terrifying ride in the van, a loud horn blared "MOVEMENT WILL COMMENCE. USE GRAB HANDLES ABOVE TO BRACE. MOVEMENT WILL COMMENCE."

She just had time to frantically reach up and grab the handles above her as the cage jerked forward. It moved with hesitating creaks before a large set of doors opened in front of her, flooding the are with light. As she stared forward, a sight that could not be.

Her attention was suddenly taken by the fact that the cage was almost dropped into a tub on what looked like a rail car. Hooks came out of sockets, latching into the bars and securing the cage on the car. It was then she noticed the two figures at the front.

Chairs swiveled around and two men in black uniforms, shiny boots, and snappy hats stood in unison. Goose-stepping towards her, they stopped, snapped a quick salute, and stared at the imprisoned woman.

"W...who...where...."

"I am Enoch" said the man on the left. "I am Elijah," the one on the right replied. She stared at them. chiseled faces of alabaster framed icy blue eyes, blonde fuzz peeking out from under their smart hats. Michelangelo could not have carved more perfect examples of the White people. The woman was sick, the beauty of what was in front of her flew in the face of all she held dear.

"We are here to rehabilitate you!" they said in unison.

"Where...this...how did we get here? This is in P...."

Enoch and Elijah laughed mirthlessly. "Not any more!" cried Enoch. "Fuhrer Trump, Sieg Heil! bought it and brought it here!" shouted Elijah.

"Where...where is here?"

"Nebraska!" they cried.

With that, the two - they could only be twins - turned with practiced precision and returned to their seats. Facing forward, Enoch touched a button on the control panel in front of him. A red, stylized "T" lit up and the rail car moved silently forward toward the familiar building, with it's rails threading through the peaked-roof arch.

The woman looked around, suddenly noticing the crowds. How had she not seen them? Thousands of White Men and Women shouted at her, jeering, calling her names. There was nowhere to go, nowhere to hide, she sobbed at things that she had once called those around her were tossed back at her. Finally, they approached the archway, and the last thing she heard before the crowds were silenced was "WELCOME TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, WHORE! SIEG HEIL!"

To Be Continued

Part 1. The Arrival. The white driverless Tesla "Electric Paddy Wagon" pulled up to the receiving hatch and push up gently against it. A metallic chunk as grabbers attached to the bars on it's back, pulling the van tight against the rubber seal. Doors opened with a soft hiss, and a single figure was pushed into the receiving cage by the ejector panel in the van. A belt pulled the figure forward, just clearing a metal grate that slammed down. The figure turned to see the van's doors close before it silently drove away, ready to capture it's next social justice warrior. A slatternly woman stood in the dark cage, a small mount of light filtering in from a hole far above. Matted red hair and dark circles adorned it face as it took in the cramped surroundings. Just as she thought she had her balance back after the terrifying ride in the van, a loud horn blared "MOVEMENT WILL COMMENCE. USE GRAB HANDLES ABOVE TO BRACE. MOVEMENT WILL COMMENCE." She just had time to frantically reach up and grab the handles above her as the cage jerked forward. It moved with hesitating creaks before a large set of doors opened in front of her, flooding the are with light. As she stared forward, a sight that could not be. Her attention was suddenly taken by the fact that the cage was almost dropped into a tub on what looked like a rail car. Hooks came out of sockets, latching into the bars and securing the cage on the car. It was then she noticed the two figures at the front. Chairs swiveled around and two men in black uniforms, shiny boots, and snappy hats stood in unison. Goose-stepping towards her, they stopped, snapped a quick salute, and stared at the imprisoned woman. "W...who...where...." "I am Enoch" said the man on the left. "I am Elijah," the one on the right replied. She stared at them. chiseled faces of alabaster framed icy blue eyes, blonde fuzz peeking out from under their smart hats. Michelangelo could not have carved more perfect examples of the White people. The woman was sick, the beauty of what was in front of her flew in the face of all she held dear. "We are here to rehabilitate you!" they said in unison. "Where...this...how did we get here? This is in P...." Enoch and Elijah laughed mirthlessly. "Not any more!" cried Enoch. "Fuhrer Trump, Sieg Heil! bought it and brought it here!" shouted Elijah. "Where...where is here?" "Nebraska!" they cried. With that, the two - they could only be twins - turned with practiced precision and returned to their seats. Facing forward, Enoch touched a button on the control panel in front of him. A red, stylized "T" lit up and the rail car moved silently forward toward the familiar building, with it's rails threading through the peaked-roof arch. The woman looked around, suddenly noticing the crowds. How had she not seen them? Thousands of White Men and Women shouted at her, jeering, calling her names. There was nowhere to go, nowhere to hide, she sobbed at things that she had once called those around her were tossed back at her. Finally, they approached the archway, and the last thing she heard before the crowds were silenced was "WELCOME TO THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, WHORE! SIEG HEIL!" To Be Continued

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[–] • 1 pt

I can't wait for the Liz Cheney episodes! In fact I can't wait to see all of the episodes!

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This comment is NSFW (click to view its content)

Part 2. The Transgression.

The rail car slowly rolled into the archway - actually a tunnel - silencing the crowds outside. The only noise that of the steel wheels rolling over the track...shhhhhchnkchnkshhhhhchnkchnk...

The woman stared into the darkness, the only light the glowing, evil red "T" on the panel in front of the two men. "W...where are we going?" she finally managed to ask.

Nothing.

Then - "BEHOLD!" shouted Elijah.

A thunderous clank of a contactor being thrown and the side of the track lit. Thousand of enormous black bucks stood there, leering at her, waving their engorged phalluses at her. "ALL OF THAT WHICH YOU HAVE RIDDEN!" announced Enoch, right before the light went off. "EVEN NOW YOU FEEL THE SIN WITHIN YOUR LOINS!" It was true, she would never touch a White man, but a giant animal breeder made her feel lust, burning deep inside. A small part of her whispered that it was meant to make her feel shame, but it did not.

The car rolled on. Another light flicked on only to show a shadowy goblin dressed in black dragging a small child into a hole. The child screamed in terror, the goblin laughed with evil. A small white hand clawed at the smooth rim of the hole, only to be pulled in a moment before the metal lid slammed shut with a noise that said it was closed forever. "THAT WHICH YOU HAVE PAID FOR YOUR GAIN!" Again, the truth was told, many souls were taken in her climb, many more were ignored as they were consumed by the shadows within. The light faded as a faint scream was heard, but she did not care.

The light shone upon the next scene. Two women sat naked at a bar, older versions of herself. Their bodies sagged, destroyed by years of drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, and sin. They guzzled from large green bottle, the purple liquid spilling everywhere before they turned to her and screeched in gravelly voices "Ya wanna join us sister?" She watched as they grabbed one another, kissing and rubbing in wine-addled delight. "THAT WHICH YOU DESIRE!" Again, that small part of her growled a warning, but she paid no heed.

Another...people she knew..."Help me!" she screamed. The figures in the scene laughed at her. Women and men from congress, her allies...no more, many held a body that looked like her down as it struggled. One that looked like a president raised a knife and ran it swiftly across the effigy's throat. Instead of blood, dollar bills came pouring out, running down like the blood that should have been there. "THEY TAKE YOUR BLOOD AS PAYMENT!" The crowd in the scene stretched out forever, chanting "Useful idiot! Useful Idiot!" as the light faded and the car moved on.

Scene after scene flashed before her. Children dancing on a stage. Bearded men in dresses. A young black male stabbing an elderly Asian woman. A figure sobbing in front of a burning store. Young men in animal costumes writhing in degenerate sex, screeching at her to take her bleeding bonus hole and begone. An evil gnomish man holding a floppy disk and a syringe, gleefully plunging both into countless decaying bodies. Her eyes grew numb to the scenes, her ears silent to the pronouncements of the car's other occupants.

Until finally, the car stopped. Another light came on, this time showing a disgusting fat goblin sitting on a black couch, masturbating it's misshapen cock to a film being projected on a tattered screen, that of a young girl with soulless eyes being sexually assaulted by a black male. The goblin turned to her and opened it's mouth full of sharp teeth. Waggling it's tongue at her, it growled "You still owe me some time on the couch, sweetheart. Success isn't free!" As the car started moving it turned back to it's film, moaning her name as it experienced whatever passed for demonic sexual pleasure.

"What do you want from me?" she shouted. The two only replied "TO SHOW YOU YOUR SIN!"

The car sped forward, picking up speed. Something was ahead...A giant figure, pale and pasty, leaned forward, it's head on the track. "IT'S CALLED X NOW!" it yelled in it's reedy voice. It opened it's mouth and the car sped through it. Another figure, dark brown, leaned forward. "I REDEEMED THE FBI SAAR!" it screeched in the voice of a million Indian call centers. Faster, faster, faster. The biggest of them all, a figure that reached the heavens. Clad in a blue suit and a red tie, it leaned it's face down and spread it's arms out. In a sibilant voice it hissed "I STARTED OPERATION WARP SPEED THAT GAVE YOU THE VACCINES! HOW MANY DID YOU TAKE?"

The woman screamed "NOOOOOOOO FUCK YOU NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" as the susurro from the orange man echoed into forever.

Screams. Screams.

Suddenly, the car approached a wall with another archway, much like the one they had entered. Two spotlights focused upwards at angles, illuminating a black eagle that sat upon a perch, watching as they slid under the archway. The car slowed, stopped, and sank into the floor. Enoch and Elijah turned to look at her, expressionless faces, as she suddenly realized the cage was gone. She couldn't move except to look around at the featureless void - even the archway they had entered was gone. There were footsteps, and a figure stood before her.

Part 2. The Transgression. The rail car slowly rolled into the archway - actually a tunnel - silencing the crowds outside. The only noise that of the steel wheels rolling over the track...shhhhhchnkchnkshhhhhchnkchnk... The woman stared into the darkness, the only light the glowing, evil red "T" on the panel in front of the two men. "W...where are we going?" she finally managed to ask. Nothing. Then - "BEHOLD!" shouted Elijah. A thunderous clank of a contactor being thrown and the side of the track lit. Thousand of enormous black bucks stood there, leering at her, waving their engorged phalluses at her. "ALL OF THAT WHICH YOU HAVE RIDDEN!" announced Enoch, right before the light went off. "EVEN NOW YOU FEEL THE SIN WITHIN YOUR LOINS!" It was true, she would never touch a White man, but a giant animal breeder made her feel lust, burning deep inside. A small part of her whispered that it was meant to make her feel shame, but it did not. The car rolled on. Another light flicked on only to show a shadowy goblin dressed in black dragging a small child into a hole. The child screamed in terror, the goblin laughed with evil. A small white hand clawed at the smooth rim of the hole, only to be pulled in a moment before the metal lid slammed shut with a noise that said it was closed forever. "THAT WHICH YOU HAVE PAID FOR YOUR GAIN!" Again, the truth was told, many souls were taken in her climb, many more were ignored as they were consumed by the shadows within. The light faded as a faint scream was heard, but she did not care. The light shone upon the next scene. Two women sat naked at a bar, older versions of herself. Their bodies sagged, destroyed by years of drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, and sin. They guzzled from large green bottle, the purple liquid spilling everywhere before they turned to her and screeched in gravelly voices "Ya wanna join us sister?" She watched as they grabbed one another, kissing and rubbing in wine-addled delight. "THAT WHICH YOU DESIRE!" Again, that small part of her growled a warning, but she paid no heed. Another...people she knew..."Help me!" she screamed. The figures in the scene laughed at her. Women and men from congress, her allies...no more, many held a body that looked like her down as it struggled. One that looked like a president raised a knife and ran it swiftly across the effigy's throat. Instead of blood, dollar bills came pouring out, running down like the blood that should have been there. "THEY TAKE YOUR BLOOD AS PAYMENT!" The crowd in the scene stretched out forever, chanting "Useful idiot! Useful Idiot!" as the light faded and the car moved on. Scene after scene flashed before her. Children dancing on a stage. Bearded men in dresses. A young black male stabbing an elderly Asian woman. A figure sobbing in front of a burning store. Young men in animal costumes writhing in degenerate sex, screeching at her to take her bleeding bonus hole and begone. An evil gnomish man holding a floppy disk and a syringe, gleefully plunging both into countless decaying bodies. Her eyes grew numb to the scenes, her ears silent to the pronouncements of the car's other occupants. Until finally, the car stopped. Another light came on, this time showing a disgusting fat goblin sitting on a black couch, masturbating it's misshapen cock to a film being projected on a tattered screen, that of a young girl with soulless eyes being sexually assaulted by a black male. The goblin turned to her and opened it's mouth full of sharp teeth. Waggling it's tongue at her, it growled "You still owe me some time on the couch, sweetheart. Success isn't free!" As the car started moving it turned back to it's film, moaning her name as it experienced whatever passed for demonic sexual pleasure. "What do you want from me?" she shouted. The two only replied "TO SHOW YOU YOUR SIN!" The car sped forward, picking up speed. Something was ahead...A giant figure, pale and pasty, leaned forward, it's head on the track. "IT'S CALLED X NOW!" it yelled in it's reedy voice. It opened it's mouth and the car sped through it. Another figure, dark brown, leaned forward. "I REDEEMED THE FBI SAAR!" it screeched in the voice of a million Indian call centers. Faster, faster, faster. The biggest of them all, a figure that reached the heavens. Clad in a blue suit and a red tie, it leaned it's face down and spread it's arms out. In a sibilant voice it hissed "I STARTED OPERATION WARP SPEED THAT GAVE YOU THE VACCINES! HOW MANY DID YOU TAKE?" The woman screamed "NOOOOOOOO FUCK YOU NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" as the susurro from the orange man echoed into forever. Screams. Screams. Suddenly, the car approached a wall with another archway, much like the one they had entered. Two spotlights focused upwards at angles, illuminating a black eagle that sat upon a perch, watching as they slid under the archway. The car slowed, stopped, and sank into the floor. Enoch and Elijah turned to look at her, expressionless faces, as she suddenly realized the cage was gone. She couldn't move except to look around at the featureless void - even the archway they had entered was gone. There were footsteps, and a figure stood before her.

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Don't tease me with a good time! Where do I subscribe!?

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Part 3. The Redemption.

The figure that stood before her looked haggard and worn, like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. Dried blood on his face from a...was that thorns on his head? He looked upon her and smiled. "I have waited for you for 2000 years. I have kept this for you." She looked in horror at the hand that raised it's palm up, the wounds just behind the wrist oozing blood. The man did not seem to notice, and only looked at her with expectation. The woman noticed a small glowing point of light in the man's hand. Pure, golden light, the most brilliant thing she had ever seen. Part of her craved that light, but she didn't know why.

"What...is it?" she said.

"Redemption. It is yours, simply ask for it."

"You don't exist!" the woman shouted. "YOU AREN'T REAL!"

The man looked at her, his eyes filled with an infinite sadness.

"GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY" the woman screeched at him.

The man lowered his gaze. "I have always, and will always love you." he said as he faded away.

The woman's heart pounded with anger. How dare these idiots show her this kind of bullshit?

Another set of footsteps behind her. She found she could move and whirled around expecting the religion asshattery again, but stopped when she realized this was someone different. A White man in a pinstripe suit, his hair slicked back, a big smile on his face, looked at her. "Who are you?" she growled.

"Kathy Griffin, my name is Ralph Edwards. And, This WAS your life!"

Invisible hands suddenly grabbed the woman's clothing even as a force pulled her backwards, painfully tearing her from what she had been wearing. Her naked body flew at breakneck speed through a doorway, even as she was dumped unceremoniously into a small brick room. A door, that description being quite generous, slammed shut, a weak bolt being thrown across just to keep it from coming open again. She looked around the room. A single lightbulb swung overhead, the frayed wire giving off sparks that made it flicker. Showerheads lined the walls, and cold concrete adorned the floor. The woman suddenly knew where she was. She got up and hurried towards the thin wooden sheet that covered the doorway and pounded on the even thinner glass. It was impossibly strong, she screamed to be let out even as hissing started. Horrified, she saw smoky gas pouring from the showerheads. The hydrogen cyanide, disobeying every physical property it had, hung in the air and didn't explode from the sparks being emitted from the light.

As she coughed and choked on the gas, she peered one last time through the foggy glass. Enoch and Elijah stared at the ground, but Ralph was looking at her. He gave her a big smile and a thumbs up just as her vision faded and she slipped to the ground.

Part 3. The Redemption. The figure that stood before her looked haggard and worn, like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. Dried blood on his face from a...was that thorns on his head? He looked upon her and smiled. "I have waited for you for 2000 years. I have kept this for you." She looked in horror at the hand that raised it's palm up, the wounds just behind the wrist oozing blood. The man did not seem to notice, and only looked at her with expectation. The woman noticed a small glowing point of light in the man's hand. Pure, golden light, the most brilliant thing she had ever seen. Part of her craved that light, but she didn't know why. "What...is it?" she said. "Redemption. It is yours, simply ask for it." "You don't exist!" the woman shouted. "YOU AREN'T REAL!" The man looked at her, his eyes filled with an infinite sadness. "GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY" the woman screeched at him. The man lowered his gaze. "I have always, and will always love you." he said as he faded away. The woman's heart pounded with anger. How dare these idiots show her this kind of bullshit? Another set of footsteps behind her. She found she could move and whirled around expecting the religion asshattery again, but stopped when she realized this was someone different. A White man in a pinstripe suit, his hair slicked back, a big smile on his face, looked at her. "Who are you?" she growled. "Kathy Griffin, my name is Ralph Edwards. And, This WAS your life!" Invisible hands suddenly grabbed the woman's clothing even as a force pulled her backwards, painfully tearing her from what she had been wearing. Her naked body flew at breakneck speed through a doorway, even as she was dumped unceremoniously into a small brick room. A door, that description being quite generous, slammed shut, a weak bolt being thrown across just to keep it from coming open again. She looked around the room. A single lightbulb swung overhead, the frayed wire giving off sparks that made it flicker. Showerheads lined the walls, and cold concrete adorned the floor. The woman suddenly knew where she was. She got up and hurried towards the thin wooden sheet that covered the doorway and pounded on the even thinner glass. It was impossibly strong, she screamed to be let out even as hissing started. Horrified, she saw smoky gas pouring from the showerheads. The hydrogen cyanide, disobeying every physical property it had, hung in the air and didn't explode from the sparks being emitted from the light. As she coughed and choked on the gas, she peered one last time through the foggy glass. Enoch and Elijah stared at the ground, but Ralph was looking at her. He gave her a big smile and a thumbs up just as her vision faded and she slipped to the ground.

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