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159

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[–] 1 pt

I gotta tell you about a great new invention!

It's called clothing! I didn't realize you were that old!

Actually, I have appropriate cold-weather gear and I don't get too pissy until it gets below 0°.

I get a little grumpy by -10°.

-20 is bullshit and entirely not okay - but I will go out in it, but only if I have to.

-21 and I'm not leaving - except to take care of important things.

-30 and you can fuck right off.

-40 is absolutely fucking retarded - but kinda awesome. That shit will kill you. So, it's almost awesome - but it's too fucking cold to be awesome.

You can start peeing on stuff at about -15°, but it doesn't get really cool until about -25. That's when it actually builds a tower of pee. You get like a stalagmite made of urine.

If you spit on something up above you, you can make a spitsicle. If you got a good loogy going, you can make a pretty sweet spitsicle. It's like a snot stalagmite.

So, it does have certain benefits - but mostly it's just cold.

The wind makes it suck balls sometimes. Heated snowmobile suits make it much better - but they suck when you get away from a power source and batteries packs for them are bulky and don't last long.

There...

Now, I'm gonna leave early. Fuck it. I am gonna go make some noise! Have an excellent day. but only if you want to!