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{The text of the document can be found in the comments. If you care to leave a comment, please do it as a reply to one of the existing comments containing the story so that their order doesn't get fucked up.}

The piece is a satirical account written by an Italian poet. It was circulated anonymously in 1614 with the three primary manifestos of the Rosicrucian Order. The reason for its inclusion with the manifestos has continued to be a source of mystery and debate.

It seems our topic du jour has been the utopian nature of so many economic theories, so I thought to myself, "What a perfect moment to post this text."

The entire story is humorous and entertaining (yet lofty and relevant), while summing up roughly the human history of moral thought on the nature of evil, taking a stab at philosophers, and possibly concealing the intentions of one of the more mysterious secret societies of the pre-modern era. After all, what is in Rosicrucianism found its way into Masonry, not surprisingly.

I'd just encourage you, as you read this work, to think about the parallels you are sure to find between the recommendations given to Apollo, and trends taking place in the world today.

At the end will be some notes/commentary which will enrich or give necessary background to certain phrases in the story; they'll be numbered in the text like footnotes, but the notes themselves will be found in the final comment of this thread.

{*The text of the document can be found in the comments. If you care to leave a comment, please do it as a reply to one of the existing comments containing the story so that their order doesn't get fucked up.*} The piece is a satirical account written by an Italian poet. It was circulated anonymously in 1614 with the three primary manifestos of the Rosicrucian Order. The reason for its inclusion with the manifestos has continued to be a source of mystery and debate. It seems our topic du jour has been the utopian nature of so many economic theories, so I thought to myself, "What a perfect moment to post this text." The entire story is humorous and entertaining (yet lofty and relevant), while summing up roughly the human history of moral thought on the nature of evil, taking a stab at philosophers, and possibly concealing the intentions of one of the more mysterious secret societies of the pre-modern era. After all, what is in Rosicrucianism found its way into Masonry, not surprisingly. I'd just encourage you, as you read this work, to think about the parallels you are sure to find between the recommendations given to Apollo, and trends taking place in the world today. At the end will be some notes/commentary which will enrich or give necessary background to certain phrases in the story; they'll be numbered in the text like footnotes, but the notes themselves will be found in the final comment of this thread.

(post is archived)

[–] [Sticky] 0 pt (edited )
 A Universal Reformation of the Whole Wide World (by the Order of God)
 is published by the Seven Sages of Greece and some other Litterati.
 Pt. 1

The famed Emperor Justinian went before Apollo to seek approval for a new law that would prohibit suicide. Apollo was astonished. He sighed and said:

“Has the government of mankind become so disordered that men willingly kill themselves? I have given them so many moral philosophers who earned their wages making their fellow men less fearful of death! Are things truly so bad that even these men, who say they were content, would kill themselves? And have I, Apollo, been asleep all the while as my esteemed men of letters have been so afflicted?”

Justinian continued pleading to Apollo for the institution of a law to prohibit suicide. After the many suicides he’d witnessed, he declared that his greater fear was that a solution would not soon be found.

Then, Apollo came down to go looking for himself, only to discover that Justinian’s claims were true: the present generations were so impaired, and men so unsatisfied with their lives and possessions, as to be killing themselves in large numbers (1). Apollo knew that something must be done quickly, so he decided to find a charismatic such as would lead mankind out of darkness, for he knew that the inspiration of one exemplary life effected change in men sooner than any set of rules. But here Apollo encountered a dilemma. There was not one among the many philosophers and virtuosos that possessed even half the necessary qualities to reform the Age.

The world was spiritually impoverished and a fitting man could not be found, so he decided to bring together a council of the world’s most famous thinkers and artisans, men of wisdom and academic esteem with the highest pedigrees, along with some virtuosos in the arts. He bestowed the responsibility of the Universal Reformation of the World to the Seven Wise Men of Greece. From all around Delphi these men had come to be renowned for possessing the knowledge of perfecting the nature of things (2), which all of the lesser men of antiquity had failed to know.

The Greeks rejoiced at this high honor bestowed upon them, but the Romans were insulted greatly. Thus, Apollo called on Rome as well, and to the council he added Marcus and Annaeus Seneca. In order to please the other Italians, he made Jacopo Mazzoni the assembly’s Secretary, also granting him a vote in their deliberations. So the assembly came to consist of: Thales, Pittachus, Bias, Solon, Cleobulus, Periander, Chilon, the Senecas, Mazzoni, and the large gang of other virtuosos who followed them to Delphi but which were not members of its inner chamber.

On the fourteenth day of the last month (3) the men went into Delphi, to the palace that Apollo had appropriated for the Reformation to take place. The day after their solemn entrance into the city, they assembled for the first time.

It is said that Thales of Miletus, first of the Grecian sages, spoke first:

“We are here to set the bones of a generation that have long since been broken. Perhaps the task is impossible, but the impossibility will only increase our glory. I assure you, gentlemen, I already know the antidote for the poisons that currently corrupt us. There is nothing which corrupts our age more than man’s private nature: his hidden hatreds, inauthentic love, the secret betrayals of those two-faced people who double-deal from under the mask of false virtues. These are the evils that must be burned or cut out, which their Doctors have passed over, but which would rectify and make man whole again.

To make men live honestly, we will call the Doctors to insert a window into people’s chests. When men speak and act, therefore, everyone who hears them will see straight into their hearts so that their virtues or vices are laid bare. Men will be compelled to match their deeds with their words because they will be banished if they are found to be liars or hypocrites.”

The whole congregation so liked Thales’s opinion they called a vote to pass it immediately, telling Mazzoni to deliver his account to Apollo at once. Apollo approved of their decision and said they should go, on this very day, and tell the Doctors to start making these windows in the chests of men, that no lie might ever again go unnoticed. However, just when the surgeons had begun to take up their instruments, a group of men consisting of Homer, Virgil, Plato, Aristotle and Averroes went before Apollo and pleaded, “Great Apollo, the most important things in government are the reputations of its leaders!” Since these philosophers knew they were great among men, they hoped Apollo would listen to them. “If your Majesty does what Thales says, and opens up every man’s heart, we philosophers who are so highly esteemed are at risk of being exposed. Your Rulership might find foul things inside these hearts which before you had thought to be immaculate. We ask only that you make adequate time for us to cleanse our souls before your surgeons go about their work.”

Apollo was greatly pleased by the request of such a famous group of men, and he decided to delay the procedure for eight days. During this eight days the philosophers went about cleansing themselves of all fallacies, vices, hidden hatreds, and feigned desires. The mess was so great that all of the grocers and pharmacies in Delphi ran out of herbs, medicines, and laxatives. The people of Greece observed that where dwelt the Platonists, the moral philosophers and the students of Aristotle, there arose a stench so great as though all of the toilets in the country had been emptied at one time! Yet, in the land of the Latin and Italian poets, there was only the smell of cabbage porridge.

The day came when the great operation was to begin, and Apollo was approached by a group of the greatest Doctors of the State - including Hippocrates, Galen, Cornelius, and Celsus - who said to him: “Sire, is it necessary that we mutilate all men, these noble and glorious images of God, just for the sake of a few ignorant people?! Surely it’s not only cunning men, but men of simpler minds too who, if they were to spend just a few days with a charlatan, could learn how to hide their truth in the deepest bowels where no window could see them. What’s more, simple men don’t even know the nature of their deepest desires which motivate them, and so the marks of their dishonesty won’t appear on their hearts, for it is they who lie to themselves and know it not! Such men believe their hearts are true, and indeed they are in a way, for the canker is not on the heart but in the bowels!”

This warning from the Doctors so worried Apollo that he reversed his former resolution, and he abandoned the plan to put windows in men’s chests. He reconvened the council and instructed them to proceed in delivering their opinions.