Jokes, jokes and more jokes. Dad jokes OK too. | Poal: Say what you want.

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436

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I'm always getting picked on at school. Just yesterday, two boys pinned me down and wrapped a entire toilet roll around my head. I hate bullies...

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I can give you the cause of anaphylactic shock...

475

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Why is girlfriend one word but best friend is two words?

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841

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Ranji is a 9 year old boy living in Namibia. He only has 1 leg, 1 arm and 1 eye. Each day, Ranji has to ride 7 miles to school along a narrow road on a rusty bike with bent wheels, no brakes and only the opposite pedal...

4

810

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My dentist informed me today that I need a crown...

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An elderly Jewish woman wins $30 million in the lottery...

2

1.3K

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My colleagues at work have given me the nickname “Mr. Compromise"...

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I like my women how I like my bacon....

2

1.3K

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The best place to meet really hot older women?

3

773

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When you think about it, the song, "Hotel California"...

320

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I saw an ant crawling on the kitchen floor, so I placed a sugar cube in its path. The ant studied the cube then turned around and walked off, no doubt to go and tell its friends where a hearty meal was...

351

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"There's actually little data to show that Asian children are any smarter than children of other races. It's really just a matter of perception, as I concluded from my research."

985

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My dad used to say, “What doesn’t kill you, just makes you stronger!”

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Anyway, how long does someone have to be dead before you can dig them back up...

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89

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I asked my five year old daughter what she wanted for her birthday. "I want unicorns, rainbows and fairies!" she giggled.

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I’ve done some terrible things for money...

578

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I took my new gun to the range to try it out, but for some reason, it doesn't work...

1

1.1K

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Why don't ants get sick?

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I finally met my girlfriend's parents for the first time today and judging by the looks on their faces they didn't seem very impressed. Miserable cunts. It was that awkward...

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323

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Reddit

279

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Why shouldn’t you mix whiskey and calculus?

2

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A boy asks his dad. "Why do they say gardeners have got green thumbs when their fingers aren't green?"

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A businessman arrives in Japan and decides to get an escort for the night. He turns off the light and proceeds to caress her. When he finally penetrates her she says, "Machigatta ana!"

1

99

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I’ve just invented a new toilet with a built in xbox and playstation...

192

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When Jane first met Tarzan in the jungle, she was instantly attracted to him and during her questions about his life, she asked him if he had ever had sex. "Tarzan not know sex." he replied.

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