A couple of not-very-gifted farmer brothers went on a tour of Europe. On their return, their neighbor saw one of the brothers outside and called him over for a chat. "So you went to Europe, eh, George?" he asked. "Did you see all the tourist attractions?" "Oh, yeah!" gushed the retard. "The first place we went to was London, Engl'nd! And they had this big ass clock, where you could go up inside and see all the gears a turnin' and wheels a workin'!" "Oh" said the neighbor. "You got to see Big Ben! How did your brother Bill like it?" "Uh, umm, Bill, Bill couldn't make it up the stairs. He's... *crippled*, ya know!" "Aw, that's too bad!" said the neighbor. "Where'd you go next?" "Well, the nex' place we went to was in Paris, France! They had this big ass skyscraper made of steel beams that went *way* up in the sky! When you got to the top, you could see all the flower gardens and everything for miles around!" "Well, you got to see the Eiffel Tower, George! How'd your brother like it?" "Uh, Bill, he couldn't go up the tower. He's... *crippled*, ya know!" "Damn shame!" says the neighbor. "Did you see anything else?" "Hell, yeah!" enthuses George. "We went to Rome, Italy, and the Pope was there!" "So your brother got to see the Pope?" asked the neighbor. "Yeah, but that ain't all! The Pope seen Bill on his crutches from his platform, and he told the guys carrying him to set him down! He walked right up to Bill, said a little prayer and slapped Bills right shoulder and BAM! The right crutch went flying off thataway!" "Wow!" enthused the neighbor. "So he was performing a miracle then?" "Yeah!" gushes George. "Then he said another little prayer, slapped Bills left shoulder and BAM! The left crutch went flying off thataway!" "A miracle!" wondered the neighbor. "So Bill can walk now, huh?" "Umm, no" groused George. "Bill, uh, Bill, he fell flat on his ass. He's... *crippled*, ya know!"