I was 27 when dad died. No siblings, a homemaker mom that didn't drive, not uncommon from her era. Trying to talk her into learning was fruitless. I stayed in the area, bought a house a half of a mile away so checking in on her was easy, ran errands, fixed things, etc. Her friends and neighbors took her out often too. Other than that, busted my tail pursuing my career thinking I might die by 50 like my dad. Or 65 like his father. Eventually the demands at work became insane and the potential for the some of the operation to get transferred across country or offshore was looming over me. After many dedicated years at 45, I felt like I had zero job security. I always dreamed of someday developing a piece of land my father had leftover from his 1970s subdivision and decided to risk everything and make it happen. I helped dad build a few of the houses in that subdivision. Lucky me, the abutting piece was a landlocked woodlot and the abutting piece to that was owned by a land company. I bought dad's leftover piece from my mother, bought the woodlot cheap, bought more acreage from the land company and optioned the rest of their parcel for later. I developed the most beautiful premium elevated mountain/lake/pond/sunset view subdivision in the area. It was a huge success. I made a lot of money in that move, and put a crown on my Dad's old subdivision. For me, it was the right move at precisely the right time. My old group was disbanded about 3 years after I left, I would have been screwed If I had stayed and missed the 2002-2008 housing boom - and the job was so all consuming I couldn't do both well. I never tried to go back. Working for oneself and being successful is far more satisfying than working for the man. Developing land was perfect for me. No partners. No employees. Huge upside potential. I had the absolute time of my life managing everything while fulfilling a 16 year dream that no one else had the vision to see.
Congratulations on getting your dream. I'll bet its a nice feeling.
Thanks! It really was an incredible feeling of accomplishment while in the thick of it. I'm so thankful my mom lived long enough to see it all happen successfully, she had seen all of the trials and tribulations of my Dad's subdivision (the Carter years were devastating). I knew the wild ride would eventually end so I took the time to relish every moment, every success. Unfortunately I didn't have another fully engaging lifelong big dream to follow it up with. My folks have both passed on, my engineering career is over, I divorced years ago, no kids, broke it off with my last long term girlfriend a year ago due to covid and politics. Longtime friends and cousins are getting old and dying off. Many moved away years ago. One side of my extended family are raging progressives that want nothing to do with me, the other side is conservative, thank God. The country is falling apart, the world is heading for Armageddon. And I'm at the threshhold of getting old. Not exactly "living the dream" lately. The biggest item on my plate is cleaning out 4 generations of family clutter and memorabilia (my folks were depression era too) and distributing it to distant family who will hopefully appreciate and keep in their families, get rid of all the stuff I've spent my life collecting to get my estate in order while I am able, so when I pass on I'm not leaving a mess for someone else to clean up. Many things didn't turn out at all as I expected in life. If I had it all to do over again, I'd have married young and had children early instead of placing my career ahead of family aspirations. However, if I had married young, I probably wouldn't have dared to risk everything to develop a speculative subdivision. Many developers go bankrupt, and some of those end up committing suicide. I know of two just in my area while I was developing my project. One guy was over $5M in the hole when his estate was finally wrapped up.
Many things didn't turn out at all as I expected in life
Of all that you shared (and I appreciate you doing so because it isn't easy for some people to do), That line stands out the most because its so true for so many of us. I hit 60 last year and the Hourglass is now tipped upside down instead of right side up. I am TOTALLY ok with that. I've had several NDE's in my life so I know how this goes in the end and frankly, it can't come soon enough because as you said, The World is a MASSIVE shit show.
But back to your thought. The guys I grew up with have all had more than their share of troubles. IDK, something in the water in our town maybe, but One is fighting Vaxx induced raging cancer, so far making progress but who knows. Three others are raging alcoholics who could never put much past basic survival together. One of them is my cousin who is a talented decorative concrete guy but he cant stay out of the bar long enough to collect his money etc. Another dude basically drank up his first house, spoiled his bariatric surgery because he wouldn't stop drinking, has had two strokes and is generally a whiny mess. Another has become a basic shut in, two others had nervous breakdowns. If you had told us all at Graduation over 40 yrs ago how it was all going to go I think we all would have laughed because it was too unbelievable.
I knew a bit differently. As I said visits through the veil can do that to you but I felt it coming a long way off. The trouble for everyone and the world at large that is. As the Seventies began to draw to a close I kept getting this feeling like everything had shifted out of phase in the world somehow and that 1980 was IT. the turning point from which there was no going back to anything we had known. Sadly, what I tried to dismiss as fear of the unknown was well justified. The 80's brought with it a cheapness. The cars got majorly shitty. TV, movies, MUSIC all took a hit. Greed was good. Snorting your brains out encouraged. Debauchery of all kinds making its way right into every fabric of life. The 86 Amnesty which took the 65 I.R.C.A. and put it on steroids and so on. Now I know that for the generation that came of age THEN they'll tell me I'm nuts and it was the greatest etc. And for THEM that's probably true. Its not like everything became crap INSTANTLY, but that IS the starting point for where we are currently at. MY take anyway based on what I "saw' coming.
Like You, I am facing the back 9 and trying to clean it all up to save someone else the trouble. I am FINALLY after 30 yrs in New York getting out. I came here in 89 pursuing a music career because in those days you had to be where the record companies were and I sure as Hell wasn't going to Cali. Grabbed a SMALL piece of the brass ring. Formed a band that after a few years got a deal. I'm on a couple of albums, never saw a dime (big shock I know), but I gave it all I had. It just didn't work out like I thought it would. There's that phrase again lol. But now, I'm finally out of here at the end of the month, Packing has commenced and I'll get to spend my last days in a beautiful state where the word Freedom still has a little meaning anyway and I'll have to be satisfied with that.
It's funny that people have such a hard time living together because despite political differences, age differences etc, MOST of us seem to want the same things. A nice place to live, a few bucks in our pockets, a chance to succeed at something and to be left the hell alone. But as long as we keep kicking each other instead of the assholes that NEED kicking I guess this is how it'll be. Thanks for sharing this with me. This is really what POAL OUGHT to have more OF right about now instead of all the Dick swinging "im the toughest guy on the internet bullshit.
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