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953

(post is archived)

[–] [deleted] 17 pts

Another conspiracy proven true! Now to get the Queen's DNA checked for lizard DNA!

[–] 10 pts

Ashkenazi Jewish is added usually from 1% to 3% to every sample so they can convince you that you're a Jew somewhere down the line in ancestry. Anyone who gets a kit back can expect that added into the report by default, it's rare not to get it. However, this lizard has an interesting 51% Ashkenazi Jewish result.

[–] 1 pt

Then call me rare. My wife, not so much, 1%.

[–] 1 pt

its not entirely a lie. in countries that fall to communism, which is judaism in all but name, the jews are free to rape each and every woman they want(favoring already married women) under the threat of death to the gentiles they rule over.

its not at all outlandish for most people today to have at least a couple percentage points of jewish DNA.

[–] 2 pts

You can just look at her and tell. Isn’t she handsome?

[–] 15 pts

It's to collect DNA it's all bullshit. The DNA is collected for nefarious purposes I'm betting. I wonder what the company does with the DNA samples after they test it

[–] 21 pts

Adds it to a government database so you that you can be tracked through your relations without your consent.

[–] 15 pts

Sounds like sending in fake samples is the solution then.

[–] 6 pts

Until one of your fake samples come up positive in a rape kit.

[–] [deleted] 10 pts (edited )

It’s not a government conspiracy, but they do own what they collect. If they’re able to produce anything from it, they own those and will reap huge profits.

Edit: archived link instead of WSJ

https://archive.md/SV2z0

[–] 9 pts

More effective bio weapon that can target specific group.

[–] 5 pts

Yes. Those are my thoughts.

[–] 7 pts

They find out compatible organ donors for whoever wants to buy one for whatever reason. Also, people who's children they want to eat. Not even joking.

[–] 4 pts

(((They))) want the pure RHneg people. No African DNA not a spec. Friend of mine said his DNA test showed Africa. Well duh the Whites have been in Morocco and N. Africa for thousands of years, doesn't mean you have nigger DNA. He's Anglo....that's what I told him. His wife is a Cunuck liberal with green card thanks to him. Of course she was thrilled that he might be "mixed"....dumb cunt.

[–] 4 pts

jews LOVE niggers. LOVE jews WANT EVERYONE to be primarily nigger. Except themselves of course.

[–] 1 pt

F I despise most Canadians mentality. Most smug and pretentious people you'll meet. Holier than the Pope.

[–] 0 pt

Found out my dad is rh neg. Not sure my type actually

[–] 1 pt

That's crazy. Where did you read that last part? The kid part.

[–] 3 pts

You hang around here long enough and you'll get all the info. Look up Adrenochrome harvesting.

Look up all the stories by celebrities themselves talking about eating kids. Mel Gibson cracked once and talked about it. What was Hansel and Gretel about? Those types of fairy tales always had a kernel of truth.

[–] 2 pts

Yeah it pisses me off because I would actually have liked to know more about my genes and family history.

We need non-Jew run genetics and pharmaceutical industries.

[–] 2 pts

I bet they are working on the next pandemic.

[–] 0 pt

I bet you're right. I believe the military is already working on new vaxxines for the next one. Crazy sick evil overlords .

[–] 9 pts

This isn't a scam. Even the Bible says they're serpents.

[–] 1 pt

That is an insult to lizards.

[–] [deleted] 7 pts

And here I was thinking those tests were a crock of shit.

[–] [deleted] 6 pts

I would send pawpaw fruit, jackfruit, and goat DNA but I don’t want to be arkancided.

[–] 6 pts

So...David Icke was right?

[–] 0 pt

According to the bible yes

Nobody went farther than david icke, he's the planck wall of the conspiracy theory world

[–] 2 pts

Found a video a while back that showed he himself might be a lizard, which would explain why he knows so much...

[–] 4 pts

Laboratory contamination.

[–] 0 pt

Or the sample itself

[–] 1 pt

We associate reptiles with dishonesty. But I think they are not likely to be more closely related to reptiles, regardless of their honesty level. I think the most plausible explanation is lab cooties.

[–] 4 pts

So either 23andMe is a total scam, or there are actual lizard people?

[–] 3 pts

Have your pets all tested.

[–] 6 pts

yeah, they could be crypto jews

[–] 9 pts

I'm looking at you, Mr Kitty (i.imgur)

[–] 2 pts

That caught me so off guard I spit my water out! Haha

[–] 0 pt

Holy shit...the troll phenotype!

[–] 5 pts

Damn! That cat looks like Ron Perlman

[–] 1 pt

He does!!

[–] 1 pt

These tests don't do full DNA sequencing. They obviously don't even do basic tests to see if the DNA is human it seems.

They amplify your DNA and then use fluorescent matchers for certain traits. Obviously, a lot of those matchers will attach to animal DNA as well, since huge chunks of DNA sequences found in mammals can be found in birds and reptiles too.

This shows the limits of this particular type of testing. 23andMe is still shitty for not doing a basic test to see if the swab is human, but there is a logical explanation for the results.

There's a Smarter Every Day video that goes into it. Also none of these labs keep DNA or fully sequence them. They've already paid for thousands of samples and it would be too expensive to sequence and store all the DNA sent to them (plus you gain nothing from them since they're semi-anonymous)

[–] 2 pts

Helix uses a slightly different method that is much more expensive, they map all know protein creation sequences, and the portions of 'junk dna' that have been found to be of interest. They keep samples in cold storage on file to update as needed. It costs a few grand per person, and they only charge a portion of this to run tests against the data they collect. the full sequence (supposedly) is never given to third parties, instead 3rd parties submit algorithms to helix to be run against your stored dna info, (i.e. if marker #543 exists person is an indian, if # 5532 exists they are french, or if marker #091234 exists red win helps with digestion) you can purchase a set of algorithms to be run against your data, but the data & your dna isn't shared back with the person who developed the algorithms. they just get a percentage of the charge.

the whole business model is that enough people will store their dna with helix, and then purchase enough of the algo packs analysis's to eventually recoup the cost of doing actual dna sequencing on their dna.

helix is different than the other dna companies. they do store and sequence. but they aren't the people who do the analysis of the dna. they are different business model, upstream of the other providers, helix develops the dna sequencing techniques and equipment directly. supposedly when all the companies that operate as you describe go belly up helix wants to be still around.

Don't know if they stick to their privacy policy or not, but in the short term their direct to consumer pricing strategy has them operating at a loss, thier short term income to fund it comes from selling equipment and back end services to other providers.

[–] 1 pt

Yet there was something in the lizard DNA which matched ashknazi Jew and not say...Irish.

So the Jews do have some lizard gene match that non Jews don't.

[–] 1 pt

SHUT. IT. DOWN!!!

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