I tend to agree with you regarding where the problem may be but it's still a negative imo. The number of women in science related fields that peace out of their careers after starting a family is kinda crazy. So you have a bunch of women that have a shit ton of education and experience invested in them and the field as a whole and, they just leave and never return to continue their careers. This isn't just my personal experience, there are a number of studies that document this issue.
This is an excellent point. It’s also one of the main reasons why in my country we have had to start actively discriminating against women in medicine as I mentioned in another comment. I’m not sure what the answer is here. Should we not educate women to a high standard because so many of them will drop out so soon? Should we encourage women at a young age to decide whether family or career will be the path they thread (and would making careers more family friendly even make much difference here)? Should we educate women anyway in spite of the cost in the hope that the benefit of those that don’t drop out outweighs the cost of those that do?
Whatever the answer, and I certainly don’t know what it is, this is the best point raised in opposition to my point.
I'm also unsure of the solution. Getting rid of all the social programing/brainwashing and letting women/girls actually decide their paths for themselves would be ideal. Not sure what country you're from but, one of the studies from somewhere in western Europe attempted to dissuade girls and guys away from their assumed fields of choice (I believe it was girls from healthcare into engineering and vice versa) achieved the opposite of the desired effect (i.e negative job satisfaction). For whatever reason and contrary to modern science, men and women are indeed different, lol. I've personally had the privilege of working with and for some very intelligent/competent female scientist and engineers but, I started out in manufacturing and basically hated every girl I worked with.
I agree with your mother, none of this shit is normal
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