A relatively recent movement championed by Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-MA) dubbed “Stakeholder Capitalism” aims to redistribute profit from shareholders—the owners of the business—to the other stakeholders, although most of her rhetoric seems directed at enhancing the fortunes of employees. In 2019, Warren updated her proposed “Accountable Capitalism Act” to obligate companies with more than $1 billion in annual revenue to “consider the interests of all corporate stakeholders—including employees, customers, shareholders, and the communities where the company operates.” There are no obvious objective guidelines for accomplishing this, and it is a zero-sum game, with winners and losers all competing for the same fixed amount of resources: employees want higher wages; customers, lower prices; and shareholders, higher return on investment—all of which are unlikely to occur simultaneously. Sen. Warren’s bill sheds no light on how to reconcile these competing interests.