The rules are so nonsensical that you couldn't even salvage that "sport" with dirtbikes.
Peak soy.
There are 3 balls. There is a large man wearing a banana suit who seems to randomly wrestle with the players from time to time. Everyone must hold a fucking stick between their legs.
Why don't they just play a real sport? These people could have just as much fun playing rugby or lacrosse.
This is the fake sport from the Harry Potter series, right? The sticks between their legs are meant to represent the brooms they're flying around on? I'm trying to use my imagination, and thinking about this fake sport in the context of Harry Potter, I'd imagine it's really dangerous zipping around on brooms and such. Seems like ALL of the appeal is drained away when the players CANNOT ACTUALLY FUCKING FLY. They just look like retards carrying sticks around between their legs.
I am convinced these people feel no shame. This is not "nerd" shit. This is pure, distilled autism, and it's embarrassing to watch.
Exactly. I know the rules (of the fictional version, at least), because I read the series before. The game was every bit as dumb in the books, but could have been cool. The problem is simply that women are shit at making up rules.
I hate that I have to outline fucking quidditch here, but it needs to be said: The game's rules in the series are fucking stupid.
There are four balls on the court. Only two types of the four balls functionally matter. Two are an identical pair that fly around autonomously to distract and beat the shit out of the players on both sides- their only purpose. One special ball gets chased by two players- one on each team- that awards 150pts and ends the game, effective earning a win by default for whichever team gets it first.
The last ball is worthless. The majority of both teams chase it around and play a funky version of niggerball with it. Points scored with it are only 10pts, so it's a wonder why the game is so focused on it; a team would have to be at least 15 goals ahead to not catch the special ball and still win, which essentially never happens. E.G. Why catch the special ball and end the game if you are 160pts behind?
I never want to talk about this again.
I read the first 3 or 4 Harry Potter books back when I was in middle school. I have faint memory of the broom sport. What stands out in my mind is something they called the "snitch", which was basically an "instant victory" if one player got ahold of it.
Wait- the "snitch" is the little ballsack tied to the big banana-dude's waistband!?
I had to read up on this. So the snitch is supposed to be this tiny golden ball with wings that is REALLY fucking fast, zipping around the air during the game. So, to simulate this in real life, they give it to a gigantic wrestler and force these nerdy faggots to wrestle it away from him?! And he can fucking dump their ass on the ground and steal their stick?! Wtf?!
When I first watched this, I noticed that 4 balls went flying, but only 1 was focused on.
This is clearly a game designed by a woman. A team can be crushing the other team on points using the "normal ball". But them some faggot with a scar on his forehead gets ahold of the snitch, and suddenly game over? This is the kind of thing a woman needs to defeat a man in sport, something blatantly unfair that will tip the scales in a desired direction.
I can't believe that this trash is worshiped to the point that grown adults put together a fucking league for it. This world needs to simply burn, all of it.
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