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So I had a decision to make on Sunday morning around 5AM. Dad was lethargic and barely communicating. Sadly, this isn’t abnormal but it was bad enough that I had to get him to the hospital. I’m not “young” but I’m big and strong. The first decision after knowing I had to bring him to the emergency room was do I call for an ambulance or try to carry him to the truck. My dad is up in age but a big man. Let’s estimate 6’2” and 210 lbs. I need to tear down his steps and build a ramp. He has steps going down from his front porch which are bad enough as a fall or trip hazard, but worse because he was too weak to be any help. I was too afraid of falling with him, so I called an ambulance.

What sucks about these decisions was me worrying about every decision I made and how much it would cost. I decided to call an ambulance. Two men, younger than me, had me lift him from the rolling chair I had him in then place him into their chair that had handles to carry him down the steps in. They asked me to help carry him down the steps. What the fuck? They might as well have been women.

Fast forward to the room in the emergency section then being admitted for the day then overnight on an upper floor. X-rays. Ct scans. Blood. Urine. All the tests. Nearly no answers.

My dad has these (weekly-ish) recurring episodes of having no energy or strength at all. I was praying I’d get some kind of solid answer. Nope. I was hoping after going over all his medicines with multiple nurses and doctors maybe if the tests didn’t tell anything, they’d catch issues with his meds.

What they found is while the X-rays didn’t show it, the ct scans told he’s had “walking pneumonia.” They ordered 2, 5-day antibiotics and kicked us loose. I made a list of questions for the doctors. My observations. My worries. Etc.

They basically just said he has an appointment with his GP in a week and to ask him.

I’m not saying all these people didn’t have good bedside manner. They did. I’m just frustrated with the general experience. How are they taking in all this money and it’s acceptable to have no answers. How can he be bullshitting with me at 10PM then can’t talk or walk at 5AM and all this money can’t buy an answer or a fucking hunch or something?

On the way out, a fucking nurse hands me a bag with a prescription inhaler and tells us when and how long to take it. I was ready to take that with us then head to the pharmacy to pick up the antibiotics. As we start heading to the elevators, another nurse stops us and asks the woman to check the name on that bag with the inhaler. It was for someone else. WHAT. THE. FUCK? They shrug it off like it’s just an oopsie.

My Dad is insured and stuff but some of this will still come out of pocket. I can’t justify it. I’m so pissed. We are where we were two days ago.

I’m just venting because Poal feels like home and I’m so tired but so anxious and can’t sleep.

Fuck.

So I had a decision to make on Sunday morning around 5AM. Dad was lethargic and barely communicating. Sadly, this isn’t abnormal but it was bad enough that I had to get him to the hospital. I’m not “young” but I’m big and strong. The first decision after knowing I had to bring him to the emergency room was do I call for an ambulance or try to carry him to the truck. My dad is up in age but a big man. Let’s estimate 6’2” and 210 lbs. I need to tear down his steps and build a ramp. He has steps going down from his front porch which are bad enough as a fall or trip hazard, but worse because he was too weak to be any help. I was too afraid of falling with him, so I called an ambulance. What sucks about these decisions was me worrying about every decision I made and how much it would cost. I decided to call an ambulance. Two men, younger than me, had me lift him from the rolling chair I had him in then place him into their chair that had handles to carry him down the steps in. They asked me to help carry him down the steps. What the fuck? They might as well have been women. Fast forward to the room in the emergency section then being admitted for the day then overnight on an upper floor. X-rays. Ct scans. Blood. Urine. All the tests. Nearly no answers. My dad has these (weekly-ish) recurring episodes of having no energy or strength at all. I was praying I’d get some kind of solid answer. Nope. I was hoping after going over all his medicines with multiple nurses and doctors maybe if the tests didn’t tell anything, they’d catch issues with his meds. What they found is while the X-rays didn’t show it, the ct scans told he’s had “walking pneumonia.” They ordered 2, 5-day antibiotics and kicked us loose. I made a list of questions for the doctors. My observations. My worries. Etc. They basically just said he has an appointment with his GP in a week and to ask him. I’m not saying all these people didn’t have good bedside manner. They did. I’m just frustrated with the general experience. How are they taking in all this money and it’s acceptable to have no answers. How can he be bullshitting with me at 10PM then can’t talk or walk at 5AM and all this money can’t buy an answer or a fucking hunch or something? On the way out, a fucking nurse hands me a bag with a prescription inhaler and tells us when and how long to take it. I was ready to take that with us then head to the pharmacy to pick up the antibiotics. As we start heading to the elevators, another nurse stops us and asks the woman to check the name on that bag with the inhaler. It was for someone else. WHAT. THE. FUCK? They shrug it off like it’s just an oopsie. My Dad is insured and stuff but some of this will still come out of pocket. I can’t justify it. I’m so pissed. We are where we were two days ago. I’m just venting because Poal feels like home and I’m so tired but so anxious and can’t sleep. Fuck.

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[–] • 0 pt

How can he be bullshitting with me at 10PM then can’t talk or walk at 5AM

Because if he takes medication in the evening before bed, he might be on two different medications that are contraindicated and his GP and pharmacologist missed it....or your father could just be having a rare reaction to one medication. See what pills he is taking in the evening before bed (if any) and point out to his GP that he has these events a few hours after taking his medication(s). If he has these events at different times of the day it is really important for you to keep a diary of the times he has them and what he took medication-wise prior to the event.

You are going to have to be more proactive in his care because the medical community won't. What you described sound pharmacological, but I'm no expert. Get a notebook and start keeping track, also write down all his medications and when he takes them in that notebook. Then research his medications yourself. The best place for this is with a Physician's Desk Reference Book, which is what the medical community uses. They have a website https://www.pdr.net/ - you don't have to be a member. They provide a ton of info on each drug, but in that info you will find dosage info, adverse reactions, and contraindications. See if he is on the recommended dosage (sometimes drug dosages are higher than need be and can cause issues like your father experienced). This will help you a lot. I wish you good luck, sounds like you will be a good medical advocate. Also, if your father doesn't have a POA or medical directive, you need to download free copies from online, help him to fill them out, and take them to a notary for certification. Most states will accept notarized documents. Trust me, do this now or you may end up spending more money later on legal fees to get these filed when/if your father is ever incapacitated because you will likely have to hire an attorney at that point.

[–] • 0 pt

Thanks a lot. I have that suspicion as well. A month ago I asked his GP about this. I also was much more vigilant making sure he’s eating enough and staying hydrated.

I have all his meds in one place. I distribute them. I make sure he’s taking them as best I can. And I’d say he’s only missed a dose or two in that month. I was so optimistic that being this strict would have helped but then more random episodes.

Then at the hospital I had all his meds woth me and my spreadsheet I keep for taking those meds. They mentioned he’s taking a lot of psych meds and seemed interested but then it just went back to telling me to talk to his GP.