Married women also have more than 10 times the assets than single, never-married women by the time they are in their 50s, which can help them close in on retirement.

Yeah no shit, because they leech off their men!

The satire version:

Marriage and babies really DO make women happier, says top researcher who's spent 20 years fucking super hot pregnant women.

...Well, I think it’s funny.

Some 40 percent of married mothers - both heterosexual and lesbian women - aged under 55 reported that they were 'very happy' with their lives

Of course these feckless cowards lump the dykes in with normal women because they fear the "muh homophobia" screeching. I guarantee you the lesbo cunts are nowhere near as happy as the straight ones, especially considering that spousal abuse is the highest among these degenerates.