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Your 16 year old son finds himself a "girlfriend", do you go out of your way to make sure that they're always supervised, never alone, etc. Or do you let it slip that you're going to be going on an overnight outing with his mother, and the house will be free for the night. He can have friends over as long as they're responsible and clean up after themselves.

On the one hand, sex is a very risky activity, and teenagers can be very untrustworthy, and frankly stupid. But if he gets the experience over with while still at school, it won't be such a big deal later, and the more sexual partners he has, the more comfortable he will be in his dating life later. He won't mary the first girl that lets him see her naked, and can think objectively about a partner, rather than just with his dick.

If he doesn't have that opportunity early, he may turn out to be an "incel", virgin, weird, etc. Socially inept or highly anxious around women... I think we all know what happens to young men that, despite trying never get laid.

On the other hand, knocking up a girl at 16 is pretty much life over, and no girl who can sneak out without their parents kicking up a huge stink is marriage material. I mean, I wouldn't let my daughter go spend a night at her boyfriend's place.

Also, if it gets too serious, it can interfere with his education. I've seen first hand how my school mate absolutely flunked his last year because he was spending too much time with (and worrying about) his girlfriend who dumped him soon after graduation. Got a job doing data entry, lives with a disabled single mother, they live on her welfare and child support payments, it's not pretty.

Your 16 year old son finds himself a "girlfriend", do you go out of your way to make sure that they're always supervised, never alone, etc. Or do you let it slip that you're going to be going on an overnight outing with his mother, and the house will be free for the night. He can have friends over as long as they're responsible and clean up after themselves. On the one hand, sex is a very risky activity, and teenagers can be very untrustworthy, and frankly stupid. But if he gets the experience over with while still at school, it won't be such a big deal later, and the more sexual partners he has, the more comfortable he will be in his dating life later. He won't mary the first girl that lets him see her naked, and can think objectively about a partner, rather than just with his dick. If he doesn't have that opportunity early, he may turn out to be an "incel", virgin, weird, etc. Socially inept or highly anxious around women... I think we all know what happens to young men that, despite trying never get laid. On the other hand, knocking up a girl at 16 is pretty much life over, and no girl who can sneak out without their parents kicking up a huge stink is marriage material. I mean, I wouldn't let my daughter go spend a night at her boyfriend's place. Also, if it gets too serious, it can interfere with his education. I've seen first hand how my school mate absolutely flunked his last year because he was spending too much time with (and worrying about) his girlfriend who dumped him soon after graduation. Got a job doing data entry, lives with a disabled single mother, they live on her welfare and child support payments, it's not pretty.

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[–] 1 pt

Your comment raises a larger issue between monogamous, traditional, conservative values, and pickup culture etc. Obviously, the two are incompatible.

My retort is that, while upbringing and a good education with good morals is extremely important, the bigger factor is welfare and consequences for actions.

You can't go against nature, and when resources are extremely abundant (welfare) it makes sense to go for an r-selected strategy.

In this case, it's a matter of being sexually experienced (one of the guys that makes a game out of sleeping with women) as a reaction to the environment, rather than the cause.