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I have two options and was wondering which is best. She lives in the ephemeral dumpster crapfest that is NYC. Her family is hpyer controlling and they got to go, since they've been pissing me off lately. Not that they cant be nice, but they're the type of family that complains they always have drama when they're the ones creating the drama. Originally my plan was to move her very far away suddenly, but I'm also thinking a slow boil approach would work where i slowly move her away farther and farther

I have two options and was wondering which is best. She lives in the ephemeral dumpster crapfest that is NYC. Her family is hpyer controlling and they got to go, since they've been pissing me off lately. Not that they cant be nice, but they're the type of family that complains they always have drama when they're the ones creating the drama. Originally my plan was to move her very far away suddenly, but I'm also thinking a slow boil approach would work where i slowly move her away farther and farther

(post is archived)

She has an amazing heart and soul, and very cute, however she is also coming from a very neurotic and abusive family. However, the primary reasons im not breaking up with her:

  • She has an extremely low sexual partner count. Since she was always shamed and humiliated by her own family for having feelings of attraction, she only had one prior partner in her entire life. Based off the way she acts and behaves when it comes to sex and her "tightness", i would tend to believe her. She's also never had an orgasm and was shamed for masturbation, making her a complete novice and outright terrified of sex.

  • She has acknowledged there is a problem in her family and WANTS to fix it, but is simply unsure how this fixing should be done. In essence she is awakened, but an infant to the world of hostile abuse, especially coming from a simplistic Christian ideal that all family is inherently good (laughably dumb), which im not even surprised the parents would use this one, since its very common in abusive religious families

  • Every time she leaves or puts distance between her and her family, they immediately start hounding her, calling 50 times a day, driving by her house, harrasing her, etc. In this sense, the first clear cut step to getting rid of the toxic issues is to remove her from the environment completely. However, since she has nowhere to go due to the way her house is structured in relationship to her parents, she's kinda lost.

Having dealt with this myself, the fallout from leaving such a helicopter family is devastating and usually very hostile. However, it is possible