You should square up, and ask with confidence. Treat it the same way you'd treat proposing to your future wife. Ask them to a nice dinner. Either cook something wonderful or take them to a nice restaurant. Eat the meal, have pleasant conversation. Towards the end, near dessert, bring up the subject and ask them directly. Do not be weak, do not show nervousness as much as possible. Show that that you'll be a strong, able provider for their daughter. If they say no, so be it, but as with anything you do, do it like a boss and whatever happens, happens.
What if they say no? In my mind you are asking for their blessing, not their permission.
Is respect their wishes. Perhaps continue to court their daughter if she wishes it. But their decision for you not to marry her is theirs. They might change their mind in time. There's a lot of what ifs in this scenario
if they say no, i cant really see the relationship surviving. She's very family focussed so no blessing from the family is gonna just end the relationship
Don't listen to that fool. You don't just square up and ask. If you are getting mixed signals from your girlfriend on what reaction to prepare for and you are questioning waiting because you aren't sure what is going to happen, the obvious problem is that you don't know them well enough. Yes wait, and get to know them, let them get to know you. Your worry indicates you haven't done that legwork yet, and if you want to spend your life with her, isn't it worthwhile to hang out with the father and/or mother at least a couple of times to have a better footing on the situation than just blind flying awkwardly with mixed signals? Do you have their phone numbers in your phone? Have you at least texted or called, sent them photos of the two of you together? Parents eat that stuff up, they want to see their daughter happy. Show them you are responsible and friendly, then have at least a hangout or two at least at dinner but more preferably something more interactive and less formal, something they like, like a sportsball game or a picnic at a park or hell help out with yardwork or go to the aquarium with the 4 of you. Be polite and respectful. Once they know you and you know them, it will be much easier.
Try and do an activity with the 4 of you. Propose something they will enjoy. The gf should be able to help there. Once you hung out with them a bit and know them better talk to the father. If you havent gotten to know him wel enough at this point you can see if he will join you for dinner or a beer. Whatever his preferences. If you get his blessing its generally good enough.
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