Shit man.
One thing I have been thankful for is that there was no real abuse. A lot of yelling and anger but nothing nightmarish. Also they were good looking people who weren't drunk or on drugs. So no chaos or weirdos around.
Maybe if I can get her on some drugs for her manic episodes I can stand her for more than a few minutes at a time. She does sometimes try to take responsibility and grow or whatever. Who knows what the future holds. I will definitely try not to be bitter towards her or think about the past at all.
What I shared is just the tip of the proverbial iceberg. Whenever confronted with a situation a person has 2 real choices. Especially at a young age. You can either let it control you and become the situation (further propagating it), or you can rise above it and be better for it.
I speak to my mom fairly regularly nowadays. About once a month or so. She's apologized. She claims to be bipolar and is heavily medicated. I've learned about trauma in her past which potentially made her the way she is. She wasn't able to rise above the trauma. She has her good days and bad days.
>Eventually I forgave her. Not for her, but for myself. The only way to move on was to fully let go.
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