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My folks have moved to Florida for the winter. My mother however is in memory care because she has mid-stage to beginning late stage dementia. There's a man in the nursing home who's taking a liking to her and they've been hanging out for the past couple of days and the staff isn't exactly trying to figure out how to have that not happen. My father comes to visit and finds this guy and my mom hanging out and he brings it up to the staff and they're like oh it's harmless. My dad's condo association just had a meeting yesterday and they went around the room and talked about their lives to each other as kind of a meet and greet. And my father keened up to a divorcee from New Jersey. So he went to go bullshit with her after the event and I think she invited him to happy hour on Friday. To me the kicker is obviously they're married, obviously they're lonely. My mother has told me that she wants to be intimate and her husband left and all she was left with was just this caretaker person (my dad). This is when she was back home. This just sounds like a dumpster fire waiting to happen. I want my dad to be happy and my mother deserves that too. at the end of the day my father is going to go home in May and my mom's going to be left in a nursing home by herself till November. My father would probably enjoy the company of this woman however it goes. I'm not saying anything will happen but I also told him that I didn't really care if it did, I'd like to see him happy, but I don't want to see him do something stupid and get played. What do you guys think?

My folks have moved to Florida for the winter. My mother however is in memory care because she has mid-stage to beginning late stage dementia. There's a man in the nursing home who's taking a liking to her and they've been hanging out for the past couple of days and the staff isn't exactly trying to figure out how to have that not happen. My father comes to visit and finds this guy and my mom hanging out and he brings it up to the staff and they're like oh it's harmless. My dad's condo association just had a meeting yesterday and they went around the room and talked about their lives to each other as kind of a meet and greet. And my father keened up to a divorcee from New Jersey. So he went to go bullshit with her after the event and I think she invited him to happy hour on Friday. To me the kicker is obviously they're married, obviously they're lonely. My mother has told me that she wants to be intimate and her husband left and all she was left with was just this caretaker person (my dad). This is when she was back home. This just sounds like a dumpster fire waiting to happen. I want my dad to be happy and my mother deserves that too. at the end of the day my father is going to go home in May and my mom's going to be left in a nursing home by herself till November. My father would probably enjoy the company of this woman however it goes. I'm not saying anything will happen but I also told him that I didn't really care if it did, I'd like to see him happy, but I don't want to see him do something stupid and get played. What do you guys think?

(post is archived)

[–] 0 pt

I hear you. He's an oath keeper, about all he has left. I just feel bad for him because there's really nothing he can do other than move her out of that place, which he can't afford to do so he's kind of stuck. I bet you he's terrified that when he has to leave in the summer he'll come back and she won't remember who he is and she'll have a boyfriend. At that point what does he do. Follow his oath, but how lonely for him.

[–] 0 pt

Highly doubt she will have a boy friend. Chances are the guy is a comfort thing that's very temporary. Women in nursing homes for dementia don't generally live long maybe few years at best. Longevity won't help when the brain forgets to breathe or awaken. Spend all the time you can and enjoy her while you can. Focus on your good memories and not concern yourself with their bickering problems. It's not your burden to hold up

[–] 0 pt

At this point there's nothing left, it's just waiting for the end. I hear what you're saying though. She's been declining for a long time and needed to be in a nursing home a long time ago. but he just resisted until she had an episode about 3 months ago where he had no choice. They're in Florida, I'm in New Mexico and Arizona, so I'm never going to get down there.

[–] 0 pt

Shit you damn close to me bruh. Yeah it's costly go FL