You sound a lot like me and I have moderate highs and extreme lows. I quit drinking so not nearly as much but trust me I've been where you are and probably am right now. It goes away but comes back soon after. Depression is a bitch I know it feels like nobody else understands. Though reading what you've written so far you are black pilled and care alot about everything and I understand that as well. Though I have and gotten off fentanyl and I sometimes only fuck with cocaine, weed and kratom to self medicate because I don't trust hospitals or doctors. I probably shouldn't be alive not only from my lifestyle but other trials are tribulations where I swear angels have saved me more than once. I don't know where I'm going with this but ride the lightning and wait it out maybe we'll all get passed depression but will never know if dead and it hurts thinking about losing people's close to me so I don't want to be the one making others mourn or setting off other chains of events. Faith is stronger than my depression though. IDK man but you are not alone I've seen similar post on here as well. You'll be good but get suicide out of your mind all together and have Faith. I have no magic words if I did I'd tell myself. Good luck don't be a faggot and off yourself. Watch a good movie and stop thinking about all the marxist degeneracy and attacks on Western European Countries and values. Also self medicate responsibly if you do. We need you so does your crazy mom and everyone else. \o
man...i wanna reply with nothing but "this" like a reddit faggot cuz I honestly don't have much else to add.. Are you me? What has happened to us? I think having been gaslit for so long has dealt the intended consequences. Isolation, disappointment, and despair. Ive walked the slow suicide route as well and many miracles have left me still standing and breathing here today, so I gues I'll be sticking around ya faggots. You damn well better be too, brothers - I feel that our work here is far from done.
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