Find a cheap, local FFL and checkout GunBroker.com. It’s like an eBay for guns and ammo, but most of the ammo is overpriced.
They have plenty of new and used guns, but I highly recommend buying new if going for a pistol (unless you opt for the revolver). And don’t jump at the first thing you see.
To get and idea of what feels most natural in your hand, go to a local range that rents guns, gun shows, or anywhere local that sells guns and actually hold what you think you want.
It took me about 2 months, but I managed to grab a brand new Springfield XD9 for $380 shipped and transferred (with a promo for 4 free mags), and a used Ruger Security Six, or .357mag, for $400 shipped and transferred that was literally like new after a routine cleaning.
Helped a few friends find what they were looking for on there too.
Best of luck.
If I don't get a shotgun the xd9 seems like the other best path
Yeah, it just depends on what you’re wanting. The benefit of a shotgun is that it’s suited for both hunting and home defense with a variety of loads/shells to choose from depending on the application and/or game.
After thinking on your question a little more, I’d probably recommend a shotgun for the reasons mentioned above if you’ve never owned a gun, but depending on where you live, most (maybe all?) indoor ranges only allow pistol caliber long guns, i.e., .22, .357, .45, etc.. That could lead to difficulty finding a place to practice which is extremely important.
If you’re in a city or suburb and you’ve already held an xd a few times, go for any caliber of that model. They’re all great performers IMO. I only went with the 9mm because I was familiar with them, and the deal was too good to pass up…again, you definitely want to hold/handle your final candidates a few times before you buy - it should feel natural, like it belongs in your hand(s). And if you’re entirely new to guns, proper training is an absolute must, even if it’s just from a well-versed friend.
TLDR; a.) think about your current location and potential constraints on being able to practice, b.) hold/handle the final candidates a few times, c.) get proper training as needed.
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