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Not that I can't find a random side ho out there in the world, that would be easy. But it seems being a widower is a humongous black mark on myself, I've sort of just detached from people completely. Sure I could talk to people, pretend to be nice, but all I have in my heart is pain and misery. It's kind of what I've been doing lately, more isolation from people. I think my church has started noticing, but i still keep a façade of happiness, i just choose not to partake in the extra stuff or stay around too long. All I feel is resentment and hatred towards those happy looking families. Part of me thinks I should start drinking again, sure its not the perfect solution, but what the fuck does it matter anymore? Nobody seemed to care when my wife died, they were all too busy counting the dollar bills or using her death as a pariah for their own cause. And then I think to myself, what if I die and leave some woman in the same predicament? How am I not being selfish with my own desires?

Not that I can't find a random side ho out there in the world, that would be easy. But it seems being a widower is a humongous black mark on myself, I've sort of just detached from people completely. Sure I could talk to people, pretend to be nice, but all I have in my heart is pain and misery. It's kind of what I've been doing lately, more isolation from people. I think my church has started noticing, but i still keep a façade of happiness, i just choose not to partake in the extra stuff or stay around too long. All I feel is resentment and hatred towards those happy looking families. Part of me thinks I should start drinking again, sure its not the perfect solution, but what the fuck does it matter anymore? Nobody seemed to care when my wife died, they were all too busy counting the dollar bills or using her death as a pariah for their own cause. And then I think to myself, what if I die and leave some woman in the same predicament? How am I not being selfish with my own desires?

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[–] [deleted] • 2 pts

No chance. You use language like "ho" and "bitch" - what woman wants to be called that?!? You ask for life advice (with sketchy-at-best backstories, weird details, etc) on poal. You constantly talk trash about the "church" you are in - I would LOVE to have a chat with you and your pastor.

Yes, sorry for your loss. I have lost a spouse as well. But man... you don't seem to be anything like Jesus, and that is the #1 criteria for a husband [who calls himself by the Name].

[–] • 0 pt

Thank God he's not like a dirty fucking Jew that commands white people to die for Jews

[–] • -1 pt

When women say 'dick' about a guy, are you also offended?

[–] [deleted] • 2 pts

offended

LOL

I'm not offended by that language, nor do I see it as becoming of "husband material." I wouldn't want my daughters marrying someone like OP - offense has nothing to do with it. Can you ask a question without assuming things that haven't been stated or claimed?

[–] • 2 pts

Do you really think OP would use the words 'ho' or 'bitch' when talking to a woman?

This is an anonymous internet forum, cupcake. You wanna get offended by something, concentrate on jews or niggers.