Anecdotes... oh man whats a good one, I suppose a good one would be when I need to discipline the kids, a situation where the kids need to put put back in line as in they just will not go to bed, but they are clearly tired. I have to wrangle the oldest into bed sometimes quite forcefully(not physical just using strong words) and my wife will sometimes get very upset and challenge my ruling, I have to then stand up to her and the kid, that would be an extreme version of a shit test. Its both of them testing my ability to lead. Honestly its the oldest daughter learning that behavior and how to deal with men to a certain extent I suppose too, I don't like it but I've learned its just a part of life, some times you have to put your foot down and tell people to just go to bed. Really I probably should listen to that advice myself and go to bed more often.
My fiance and I are discussing this right now. I think I finally get it. It just not something I do often because I have no need to test him, I know he's going to put his foot down if he needs to.
Something we talk about often is how we as humans have a very 'animalistic' brain that people like to pretend doesn't exist. A lot of the things we do are things we do for survival. Like overeating! We don't need to overeat, but we want to because our animal brains are saying 'well, you don't know when you're going to eat next, you need to consume as much as you can just in case!'
I think this is a similar situation. Men were the hunters, the defenders, the ones that protect the women and children. I feel like nowadays we live in a world where masculinity is kind if undesirable and all around shit on. But women and children, conscious or unconscious, still crave that security and leadership that has helped us survive up until this point.
This is my understanding of it, is it’s a survival thing.
I’d love to ask your fiancé What he thinks. If he wants to check out poal.co, fyi I’m the owner so I can say no matter your opinions you are more than welcome here.
He's thinking about signing up as well.
I found this place after looking for an alternative to reddit after I got banned from a sub just for being subscribed to another sub they disagreed with. -eyeroll- So I'm pretty stoked to have found this place. Thanks for making it!
Luckily for you, she's picked someone with ample opinions to share!
So I'm obviously the fiance. And I'm convinced much more of our daily actions than we realize are driven by our instincts/animal brain. And I certainly think this "shit test" is one of those things.
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