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Here i am asking for advice on my throwaway again.. i don’t know what to do here. i wanted to homeschool our kids, keep them out of daycare ect. and i know that statistically they’re more likely to fail without their dad. not to mention single moms are a joke. i’ve tried to enjoy the good moments and pretend the bad isn’t happening for years. but i get yelled at over stupid stuff almost daily, hit a few times a month at least. i’ve been hit nearly every holiday for years, especially on christmas. i’ve had so many lumps on my head, probably a few broken fingers, giant bruises, ect. he’s choked me. dragged me around by my hair. dumped full trash cans with heavy stuff on me. i can’t even list it all. he’s horrible. i’m dreading the holidays. this can’t be how my life was supposed to go. i need advice.

this is hidden from the kids so far.. my husband is a decent dad despite how he treats me. For the most part. Decent dads don’t hit their kids’ mom I guess. But he’s so protective of them, actually nice to them, that’s one of the main reasons I haven’t left. i wouldn’t keep them from him if we split, though i’d want them living with me. i don’t believe in child support, and want to homeschool the kids/keep them away from sitters. there’s probably no way to leave. should i continue to suffer silently for our kids or try to leave? if so, how? will i be viewed as a failure like typical single moms, even though my kids weren’t born out of wedlock? i would’ve left when this behavior started but it only started after i got pregnant with our first. i don’t have any family to go to because my parents were abusive as well. i feel so stuck. it’s like no matter what i do i’ll be miserable. stay and be yelled at and hit, or be single the rest of my life with kids who don’t have a dad. my life is a fucking joke. i’d do anything for my kids, i can’t stand being treated this way though. i’ve reached out on 4chan and a couple other sites and got such jewy answers. i know being a single mom isn’t ok, it’s terrible for kids and i feel selfish for even considering leaving. what do i do..?

Here i am asking for advice on my throwaway again.. i don’t know what to do here. i wanted to homeschool our kids, keep them out of daycare ect. and i know that statistically they’re more likely to fail without their dad. not to mention single moms are a joke. i’ve tried to enjoy the good moments and pretend the bad isn’t happening for years. but i get yelled at over stupid stuff almost daily, hit a few times a month at least. i’ve been hit nearly every holiday for years, especially on christmas. i’ve had so many lumps on my head, probably a few broken fingers, giant bruises, ect. he’s choked me. dragged me around by my hair. dumped full trash cans with heavy stuff on me. i can’t even list it all. he’s horrible. i’m dreading the holidays. this can’t be how my life was supposed to go. i need advice. this is hidden from the kids so far.. my husband is a decent dad despite how he treats me. For the most part. Decent dads don’t hit their kids’ mom I guess. But he’s so protective of them, actually nice to them, that’s one of the main reasons I haven’t left. i wouldn’t keep them from him if we split, though i’d want them living with me. i don’t believe in child support, and want to homeschool the kids/keep them away from sitters. there’s probably no way to leave. should i continue to suffer silently for our kids or try to leave? if so, how? will i be viewed as a failure like typical single moms, even though my kids weren’t born out of wedlock? i would’ve left when this behavior started but it only started after i got pregnant with our first. i don’t have any family to go to because my parents were abusive as well. i feel so stuck. it’s like no matter what i do i’ll be miserable. stay and be yelled at and hit, or be single the rest of my life with kids who don’t have a dad. my life is a fucking joke. i’d do anything for my kids, i can’t stand being treated this way though. i’ve reached out on 4chan and a couple other sites and got such jewy answers. i know being a single mom isn’t ok, it’s terrible for kids and i feel selfish for even considering leaving. what do i do..?

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[–] [deleted] 2 pts

Unless you're being violent, there's no excuse for him being violent. Fuck what people think; shitty single moms get a bunch of tattoos, go out drinking and whoring and spending money they don't have. Don't be a shitty single mom and you're good. Talk to a lawyer. Get yourself together, focus on your kids, and don't worry about men and dating until you have your head straight. There are many single men with kids who specifically look for good single women with kids.

Statistics showing all the shitty outcomes for kids with broken homes are skewed correlations. Useless. Outcomes have more to do with value systems and morals than anything else.

Talk to a lawyer.