I feel like I need some counsel outside my friend group. A third party, unbiased, confidant with some legitimate experience. I don't go to a church, so I don't have a particular elder/pastor type to go too; Don't think a random one will be the best idea either. My thought is to seek out much older practitioners. If convenience has it, one that went to a school that was not known for extreme commie-radicalization at the time he went. Doubt I will have much of a choice in the my city. Then again, some things are best left unsaid.