Ugh, it sucks bro. Did 10 days about 5 years ago, reckless driving, and it's shitty. The food sucks. It's loud. It's crowded. I'm a smart person, by all accounts, and if stupid annoying people piss you off, you're going to be totally pissed off all the time. If you're going to be spending months in there, look for someone like yourself. Having someone to bs with helps pass the time. Figure out real quick what food you can handle eating and see if you can't find people to trade the the things you don't like to people willing to give up the things they may not care about as much as you.

It's pretty unlikely it will be big enough for real "gangs" to form, but if there is, and you have any question about your safety, you shouldn't dismiss grouping up with a gang. As a last resort. There's power in numbers. Lie, agree with them, do whatever you're comfortable with in trying to fit in. If you're not spending years in there, it doesn't matter that you're lying to them, just NEVER go back. Find a good bunk if possible. I went for a top one, but each to his own. Avoid bunks near bathrooms/showers/doors.

Don't be a pussy. Be stoic. If you have questions, find an outlier, somebody that's not with all the loudmouth talkers and bullshitters that group up and do nothing but laugh and yell super loudly. Fuck all those people. They are nothing but drama. You don't want drama. You want to keep your head down, do your time, and never see that place again.

Legally transition to female and go directly to lady jail.

Wtf? Has everyone here been in jail?

Mind your business. Don't borrow, lend, or "be nice" by giving someone something cause they'll never stop. Don't ask, don't tell. Don't get friendly with staff. Fight if you have to or else you'll get run over daily. Being called outside your name is instant fight time, especially if you get called a bitch, punk, pussy, or anything of that nature. If you're not an easy target, it'll be better for you even if you get punched in the face a couple times. You are who you hang around so don't fuck with the gangs, gays, or bitches. You can be chill with most, but don't hang out with everyone. Don't look into people's cells. Protect your phone pin. Don't make three way calls for people. Don't eyeball but be aware of your surroundings.

Jail isn't prison. It sucks but it's not the end of the world. You'll be in there with a bunch of grown middle schoolers. Just do your time and leave everything else alone. Trust no one and remember nobody is your friend. Good luck dummy. Don't go back.

I've never been to jail. I'm not a nigger.

I did 45 days 20 years ago. If you can draw, people will pay you food and favors to draw things for them on their letters to girlfriends. Or tattoos. I don't know what it is about jail, but criminals like art. I was like 18 or 19 at the time, wasn't a big trouble maker, but got into some trouble. But i can draw really well which became quite popular in my pod, had people bringing me shit, it was crazy.

Sounds like you're not going to do more than 30 days. I don't know the nature of the offense, but "stupid mistake" first offenses won't garner a whole lot of jailtime. If you're being truthful, of course.

First thing: Jail is NOT prison. The probability of your butthole virginity being stolen from you is quite low. However, chances of your commissary stash being stolen by niggers is quite high. Also, chances of you being blamed by the nigger in the cell next to you for stealing items in HIS commissary stash is also up there.

Get some money in your commissary right away, either bring your own (if they allow it) or have a family member deposit money into your account. You will need it.

Your biggest enemy is going to be boredom. If you're going to be there for a longer period of time, say a two-year stint (probably the most anyone will do in the county), get a trustee job right away if you can.. depending on the jail rules. If you don't have a trustee job, your daily routine is wake up, shower, chow, spades, tv, chow, euchre, tv, chow, spades, shower, bed.

Shower twice a day. Get ahold of some real toiletries and grooming items from commissary ASAP, that free shit they give you in your bed roll just ain't gonna cut it. Stress sweat smells way worse than regular BO, and you'll notice your own stench pretty quickly. Also, buy underwear and socks ASAP. You'll find it hard to get dry with the tiny towel they give you.. you have to use the knife edge of your hand to "squeegee" away the water from your head and body first before using the towel. Funnily enough, I still do this after every shower now..

Keep your head down. Most people in the county just want to do their time and GTFO without additional trouble. There are a few bastards who truly don't give a shit (usually niggers), and will try to start shit with you in order to extend your time.

Don't tell anyone how much time you have, especially if you're a "short-timer." That will just make you a target for the nigger bastard who wants your stay there to be as long as his is. Some jails this won't be possible, they keep a white-board with everyone's info on it in the dep's cage or desk or whatever the fuck they have.

Food.. it's hit or miss. County jail food ranges from "not so bad" to "torture by meal." You'll know what kind of jail you're at by the first chow-time.. if it's not so bad, it's always not so bad.. if it's torture food, it's always the torture food. We're talking hard beans and a slice of moldy bologna torture. Good luck.

Edit (add): Don't throw any food away, people get pretty dang pissed off about this. If you're not going to finish your tray, offer up what remains to those around you.

Cellmates.. I've had mostly cool cellmates or bunkmates (jail cell or dormitory setting). If you find yourself bunked up with a meth head covered in scabs or similar disease ridden shithead, you do everything in your power to get the hell away from that. The couple of times this has happened to me, I explained my situation to the dep or CO in charge, and they were cool about getting me moved.

In summation, it's not the most pleasant thing in the world. But it's doable. You'll fall into the routine and before you know it, the dep will come by and tell you to pack your shit- your sentence is over. Remember, it isn't prison!

If you have any other questions, feel free to PM.

Drunk tank once or twice. 46 on 60 about 20 years ago in a county jail. Mostly stunk and we were locked away 24/7 short of an hour on Sunday for church or aa. Kept to myself and did my time. It's not Oz, nobody getting raped. I worked out and read books. Pretty easy time if you stay out of jailhouse drama.

Remember, everyone in jail thinks their a badass and innocent.

Yes here's a [description] of roughly the amount of time I was in jail. It's good to know that this won't be used against me when we are all arrested. Thanks for asking about our personal lives glow niggers and thanks to all the morons on here who don't understand what phishing is.

Find out the toughest guy there and kick his ass with your toothbrush.

Never been but a buddy spent a week in county and he just said it was boring and the food sucked. He did what everyone here is saying, just kept quiet and passed the time with books.

Most of the people in the local jail are in on drug and alcohol related stuff. Some beaner gangster wannabes, but nothing terribly bad. He said there were no prison gangs and no real drama just a bunch of dudes bored off their ass wanting a beer.

They did however, break his glasses on accident while checking him in, so he got to use their crappy prison glasses, so he could only read for short periods.

For as mellow as it sounds it was good for him. He got out, swore he'd never go back. Sobered up, and divorced his harpy drunk wife (reason he got sent in)

Good luck OP, always improve yourself no matter where your at in life