Sounds like you are just questioning yourself for not feeling bad about something that everyone always says you should feel bad about. It doesn't help, for instance, when someone dies and everyone gives you all the sorry looks and phrases, and you barely knew the person or simply have accepted death as part of life. Hell, there have been some instances when I have been glad someone has passed just so that they are no longer suffering, but that doesn't mean I don't miss them or didn't love them. Chalk it up to human duality and being a decent enough person to care about your connections to those close to you. Sorry for the wall of text.