Is Anyone, Male or Female, Capable of Unconditional Love? [858x1000 - 702KB]

[–] • 4 pts

I do not think that once you love a person, you can decide to stop. Even in the case where the person becomes a crazy drug abuser who is a shadow of who they once were, you still love and mourn the loss of that person. You'll still look for the person inside of that darkness, until you have to make a decision removed from emotion to let them go.

I think your understanding of love is rather shallow. You don't love a person for what they do for you. You love a person and desire to do for them. You desire to put them first. It can be a feeling, but most often it is a verb. It's work. Love is not this thing that you feel at the beginning of a good relationship. That's just lust and titillation. And the way you feel about a person who betrays you with lies, or cheating, or whatever, is hurt. You feel hurt, because you still love them. And the love makes it hurt all the more.

The hurt doesn't take away the love.

link

[–] • 1 pt

I would agree with your sentiments.

Love is a process, it begins with what you thought was love with those girls. And through time your heart and mind weigh what quality you have. It becomes a commitment, a verb, at the point that you decide that you'd rather go through the worst you can imagine with a person, and try to support them so that it's not so bad, than not be with them(for better and for worse isn't just a cliche term in vows). No person is ever perfect, we are all messed up in some way. But when you find the right person, it becomes worth overlooking the faults. And some people are significantly easier to love than others. Some people make it impossible to love them. Some people aren't ready to love, or be loved.

The best thing you can do is find a person who has consideration of these things as you begin to date. And you should also have these things in mind as you begin to date. It will stop you from being frivolous with your time and energy. Even the women you consider throwaways and one night stands take away from you. While you're with them, you won't find anything else because your mind and goals are wrong, and you compromise your future self both through potential disease and offspring. You can't be dual minded.

parent
link

[+] [deleted] • 0 pt

[–] • 2 pts

No.

Love and marriage are business deals. Everybody needs to bring something of value to the table.

For marriage, it has to be something of lasting value. Sex and a pretty face are helpful, but they are not lasting values.

link

[–] • 2 pts

Women are incapable of loving men the way that men can love women. Understand this.

Men love women. Women love their children.

link

[–] [deleted] • 1 pt

Yes, and very simply.

First, you're talking about romantic partner love, not human love for family or things.

Any system needs fuel.

If both parties are in love, and apply effort - a state of love is achieved. The system of love is sufficiently supplied.

It is only within this state of love that the state of love itself can be improved and refined, which takes equal effort from both parts.

Within this system, acts of selfless love can be performed for the partner, whether it's a foot rub, doing the dishes, going on vacay, taking care of them when they are sick, telling them pleasantries, giving them multiple orgasms even though you only get one.......

This is love. Small scale, moment to moment, daily love IS the "ultimate love" you speak of, because this is where it is built.

It isn't until the end of the road that you can look back at the monument you have created in tandem that you will truly understand the power and the meaning of love.

Until then, you believe and hope, and that's what makes it happen - that's when it finds you.

If one person is not trying, it is not love.

But if both try, it is achieved.

It is not uncommon.