I grew up watching a parent and spouse fight, and learned how utterly stupid and pointless it is to have fights. There's not a single thing worth saying that can't be said in a gentle, reasonable manner. My wife and I have never yelled at each other, even when dealing with major disagreements, and it always turned out for the better.
Same here. Screaming parents led to an adult aversion to people who cannot control themselves (which also feeds my loathing of the left.) Yelling causes IQ to drop about a million points. May as well argue with an amoeba! I found that if you speak more quietly than usual, some ingrained human instinct to become quiet and vigilant (hush, the tiger is listening!) comes into play, and real communication gets done, leading to real conflict resolution.
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