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I work for a very large company. Right now im trying to figure out how i can get fired. I want them to pay out the severance, but they absolutely refuse to do so. They want to do all this PIP stuff instead for underperformance, but it feels so draining, all i want is the severance check, is that too much to ask for?!

I work for a very large company. Right now im trying to figure out how i can get fired. I want them to pay out the severance, but they absolutely refuse to do so. They want to do all this PIP stuff instead for underperformance, but it feels so draining, all i want is the severance check, is that too much to ask for?!

(post is archived)

[–] 2 pts

Take a shit in you boss’s trash can?

[–] 2 pts

Don't do misconduct you won't get unemployment

[–] 2 pts

Just a joke friend.

My best lived advice is, reduce work output to 80% and walk right on the line of anti-NPC behavior.

I received a pink slip for just that, purple hair man hater, couldn’t understand why a female employee wouldn’t jump on the fuck patriarchy wagon.

I knew it was coming, but didn’t want to put in a two wk notice. High and dry, the best action on my part.

[–] 1 pt

does that work for anybody but neonhairs? they seem to be more vindictive than anybody else.

You don't get unemployment for getting fired for cause, period? The only way I can draw unemployment is if I get laid off, i.e., there's nothing for me to do within the company and they can't justify paying me.

[–] 1 pt

The important word is "misconduct"

And when they call you literally don't say any other phrase than "I don't know"

[–] 0 pt

Just fuck of your personal hygiene. No shower. No deodorant. Don't change clothes. Play with dogs before work. Jog everywhere. Have crazy hookers constantly calling your coworkers asking for you. I think that'll work. No misconduct

The middle of the desk is more appropriate.

[–] 0 pt

Presentation is always important

Quick read, I thought you said

>"Penetration is always important"

[–] 0 pt

location, location, location