I once won a goldfish at a fall festival that lived for 12 years.

2 kilos of primo weed. I didn’t kill, hurt, lie, cheat, or steal from anyone. And I got it legally. Oh yeah that was cool.

A prank Pepsi can that would shoot water out of the side when picked up. The great thing was that it was completely plastic and the can logo was shrink-wrapped and kind of blurry. You had to press a super obvious button on the side to get the water shooting thing to activate, so it wasn't something that would realistically happen just by picking it up. It took took AA batteries and was really loud. Didn't look like a real can of Pepsi even from a distance. Basically, it was the worst practical joke ever but I got it for free at a church bingo. I wish I still had that thing.

My friend gave me his Pioneer surround sound receiver with THX and Paradigm speakers to go with it. He was replacing the receiver because the subwoofer occasionally craps out. I find it works most of the time and even sounds great without the woofer. I got the speakers cause he couldn’t sell them and pay for shipping at the same time so he just gave them to me.

Life itself for which, I am eternally grateful.

I was going to say "a vigorous assfucking by the government" until I realized that I actually paid for that.

Voat.co

a set of wooden golf clubs

A deck of marvel cards from one of the hottest girls in my school in grade 7

Forgiveness