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I got engaged to my fianceé in April. Shortly after, we found out she was pregnant. This has been a source of great joy for me and both of our families. It was to her also. Our lives have become centered around the baby, who is due March 2nd. Tomorrow we are moving out of our individual one bedroom apartments to move into a large two bedroom house. She is not going to work anymore after this and I’ve worked my ass off, having only four days off in four months to try and save more money in preparation. We never had any problems before, we were happy and excited for the future. That is all changing very rapidly. She has started insulting me, all the time. I’m working actual 80 hour weeks and doing my best to give her everything, and I’m mocked for being tired. She has become so cruel towards me. I smile and tell her she needs to take it easy. She says things so degrading and demeaning I’d hit her if she wasn’t pregnant and this has become the norm. I keep justifying it by telling myself she is pregnant and hormonal, but I can’t help but feel that this is something else entirely. Now the night before we are moving she’s telling me she wants no life with me, that she’s leaving as soon as her dad finds her a new place to move, calling me pathetic, how the child will never know me. That’s only a snapshot. She will say the worst things she can conjure up . Mind you I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. I started myown carpentry business this year after working for someone else for fifteen years. I’m providing for her every way I can. I’m renting out a distillery and throwing her a baby shower, hired a planner and having it catered for all her friends and family. I may be biased but any one else would be very happy right now and yet I am getting nothing but vitriol. It’s all being stolen from me. Even if she stays out of necessity I can’t live like this. Everything seems bleak and my options all seem drastic. I can’t think clear enough about this from within this nightmare. I don’t have any friends around here. What are your thoughts

I got engaged to my fianceé in April. Shortly after, we found out she was pregnant. This has been a source of great joy for me and both of our families. It was to her also. Our lives have become centered around the baby, who is due March 2nd. Tomorrow we are moving out of our individual one bedroom apartments to move into a large two bedroom house. She is not going to work anymore after this and I’ve worked my ass off, having only four days off in four months to try and save more money in preparation. We never had any problems before, we were happy and excited for the future. That is all changing very rapidly. She has started insulting me, all the time. I’m working actual 80 hour weeks and doing my best to give her everything, and I’m mocked for being tired. She has become so cruel towards me. I smile and tell her she needs to take it easy. She says things so degrading and demeaning I’d hit her if she wasn’t pregnant and this has become the norm. I keep justifying it by telling myself she is pregnant and hormonal, but I can’t help but feel that this is something else entirely. Now the night before we are moving she’s telling me she wants no life with me, that she’s leaving as soon as her dad finds her a new place to move, calling me pathetic, how the child will never know me. That’s only a snapshot. She will say the worst things she can conjure up . Mind you I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. I started myown carpentry business this year after working for someone else for fifteen years. I’m providing for her every way I can. I’m renting out a distillery and throwing her a baby shower, hired a planner and having it catered for all her friends and family. I may be biased but any one else would be very happy right now and yet I am getting nothing but vitriol. It’s all being stolen from me. Even if she stays out of necessity I can’t live like this. Everything seems bleak and my options all seem drastic. I can’t think clear enough about this from within this nightmare. I don’t have any friends around here. What are your thoughts

(post is archived)

[–] 6 pts
  1. Whats her background? Any abuse or abandonment issues as a kid? Are her parents together? Sounds almost like Borderline Personality Disorder aka BPD. Women with BPD tend to go off rails like that and you become the enemy. You can actually salvage a relationship with a BPD but it takes work, its not easy after they have flipped on you. The trick is to catch it early when they start switching and you have to grit your teeth a lot. But it can be done no matter what people say because of the abandonment issue.

  2. Whats your relationship with her parents/siblings? Because honestly, regardless of anything, THAT is who I would go to. Win them over in this situation. If its just hormones which IS possible as some women go nuts with pregnancies. Either way you want them on your side because this will involve a child.

  3. What are her friends like? Never underestimate the enabling of a friend. Women are capable of encouraging other women to burn up their lives out of jealous motives. But some friends are also good people and friends. But you need someone in her camp that you can talk to on the sly and find out if shes having an affair. Preferably someone who can keep their mouth shut on your behalf.

  4. If shit goes completely sideways and she leaves whatever, say nothing but get a lawyer to preplan custody fight.. For this you want to document her behavior but do it without her finding out your recording her. In other words, yeah try to fix things but at same time cover your ass in case you cant fix things. Do you have access to her phone records or social media accounts? Have to pry very carefully here. Do not be stupid and wreckless when looking for stuff.

  5. Ask neighbors you think are your friends if they have seen anyone coming or going or her coming and going and if so for how long has it been going on.

  6. If things end you will have lawyer ready. File for paternity test. If its not her hormones or BPD, then its possible the child is not yours and shes acting like this because of that whether she even realizes it or not. If its your kid, better figure out the worst scenario you can live with.

  7. Do NOT put your hands on her, at all, if she attacks you eat the blows and film it and keep that film away from her. Trust me on this. If you can hand video or witnesses to police/CPS/Judges that show her verbally and physically attacking you while you do nothing, you should win a favorable ruling.

  8. Start hiding money, NOW. Cash is king. Keep as much cash as you can off books without exposing yourself to any audits. Then hide that shit and dont hide it somewhere stupid either. Women are snoops btw.

  9. Keep calm. This is most important. If its over its over and you will be thankful later that it ended before you made it all legal. Its hard but when that moment comes even after trying to repair relationship that its over, let the pain go. Do be angry or depressed and go get laid as quickly as you can. Bang one of her friends, yes I am serious. If she has any friends you actually like and would date, do it. The worst thing you can do is become stalky bitter nutjob or a depressed alcoholic. You want her to not think she broke you but instead you are out banging chicks. Put Tinder on your phone and use condoms.

I have more but need more info.