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I have to work and I have 3 kids. I miss him everyday. I was a housewife when he was alive. I didn't have friends because I don't like people, just him. I liked our life a lot. Now I'm just alive, and my kids will grow up and move out and I'll be alone forever. Im not going to kill myself but want to everyday. I just want to be with him. I want the pain to end. But I can't because of the kids. How am I supposed to deal with this.

I have to work and I have 3 kids. I miss him everyday. I was a housewife when he was alive. I didn't have friends because I don't like people, just him. I liked our life a lot. Now I'm just alive, and my kids will grow up and move out and I'll be alone forever. Im not going to kill myself but want to everyday. I just want to be with him. I want the pain to end. But I can't because of the kids. How am I supposed to deal with this.

(post is archived)

[–] [deleted] • 25 pts

Turn to God. I've been an atheist for most of my adult life. As I get older I realise I was wrong. Our human minds need God. You need God. I don't like people either but at church it's different. It's not the same as dealing with people at work or the store.

Maybe you already go to church... I've prayed for 2 people in my life so far, I'll pray for you tonight, for strength, for peace and for your kids.

[–] • 5 pts

Thanks

[–] • 1 pt (edited )

Did your late husband have a brother?

If yes, he is technically responsible for taking you and your children in and caring for you. Heck, if we followed the old ways he was charged with marrying you and adopting your kids. But that was before muh modernism and muh feminism.

Join a church of based people (not Joel Olesteen faggotry), pray to God for assistance. You may find a decent man there. Good luck, prayers for you as well today.

[–] • 1 pt

Out of curiosity, what changed your mind?

[–] [deleted] • 9 pts

I think it was a combination of many things happening in my life. I'll list what comes to mind.

  • Voat.co
  • Having children
  • Heritage
  • Culture
  • Donald Trump
  • pro-life movement
  • trans movement
  • red and black pills...

When Cannon Hinnant was shot it was the end of my atheism. For the first time in my life I prayed; for Cannon and his father.

My wife agreed, we should stop calling ourselfs atheist and join a church. We had gone several times with close friends, but when we decided to join lockdowns happened.

I hope OP got something out of her post. We are honestly a great group of people. Stick together. Stick with God.

[–] • 4 pts

Voat helped make you Christian? I know a lot of the users were Christian but it didn’t seem to come up much, and there was no active subverse about Christianity. Most of the Christians I know in real life would be horrified if they read some of the Voat posts

[–] • 0 pt

When Cannon Hinnant was shot it was the end of my atheism. For the first time in my life I prayed; for Cannon and his father.

If you pray, pray for justice.

[–] • 0 pt

"Needing" god and your username are perfectly aligned.

[–] [deleted] • 1 pt

My user name is a reference to a William Shakespeare quote about being humble to ones intelligence.

A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.

[–] • 0 pt

The very idea of someone who believes in fairy tales to justify not having to create their own morals by deciding right from wrong on their own, using a parable about wisdom, had me laughing for a good 10 minutes.

Thanks. My morning needed that.

[–] • 18 pts

I have 3 kids
I'll be alone forever

The only people whom die alone have no family. Keep a close relationship with them.

[–] • 5 pts

Kids leave. Then come and visit twice a year if you're lucky. A spouse lives with you everyday. I will be physically alone in the house he bought and fixed up until I die. Yes I will have grandkids someday but while I'm making them cookies they will have no Grandpa stories to listen to.

[–] • 4 pts

Then sell the house and move nearby to them. They will have YOU to tell them stories. I'm sure your husband couldn't give a fuck about the house if it means being closer to your children.

[–] [deleted] • 2 pts

Have you considered attending a church function, when they come back next year (or so) where singles get together? No one will replace what you had as a couple. But, you can still find a new lifelong friend.

[–] [deleted] • 0 pt

Then come and visit twice a year if you're lucky.

If someone only visits you during christmas, they don't enjoy your company. They just feel compelled to do it.

The fix for that, would be to make certain they enjoy your company. And offer babysitting their grandchildren so they can enjoy a weekend alone etc.

But that requires effort. And it will not replace a dead spouse.

[–] • 1 pt

so many people are so tyrannical to their children the kids dont come bye

[–] • 0 pt

And by tyrannical, most entitled shits mean rules that discourage laziness and degeneracy.

[–] • 0 pt

thats not what i mean, discouraging laziness and degeneracy is natural and normal, and thats a great thing.

[–] • 13 pts

Find a widower maybe, and you two help each other

[–] • 10 pts

Damn. I wasn't expecting getting feels in a Poal thread. Bless you ma'am

[–] • 5 pts

/u/Owlchemy died here on Poal, you want feels go read his last stuff

[–] • 2 pts

I see by his posts life was more of a pursuit of science/leisure not like this Dystopia we are in now. CCC - Communism, Covid, Crap

[–] [deleted] • 2 pts

I remember Owlchemy, he was definitely a good guy. RIP, Owl.

[–] [deleted] • 9 pts

imagine how much more pain your kids would go through with the loss of another parent. Patience and time heals wounds, God bless you.

[–] • 5 pts

I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. I wish I could speak words that would help you in your time of distress. Are you a religious person? Cry out to Jesus - truly seek his face - and he will give you the peace that transcends all understanding. Godspeed and God bless.

[–] • 5 pts

Time. You will feel better with time. I lost my wife to cancer 6 years ago. She too was my only friend, literally the only person I really socialized with. I felt like I had died with her. I was devastated and did not care about anything including myself afterwards, though my life was over. But guess what? I'm perfectly fine now. I can think about her without pain and focus on the good times we had together. I'm actually happy as hell in life right now. You just have to keep moving forward and I can promise you 100% you will also be fine one day. It will happen faster than you probably think. Keep your head up for your kids, I don't care how hard it is you need to do that.

[–] • 0 pt

I lost my wife to cancer 6 years ago.

I'm really sorry to hear that. Your advise is good.

[–] [deleted] • 3 pts

Hope that you'll get to see him again one day...and fill up what remaining time you have left with stuff you'd want to tell him when you see him.

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