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150

Not sure this is the right sub.

My parents and father in law died long ago, RIP. Wife and I are looking for a new home and considering getting one large enough for us to invite her mother to live with us.

She has physical limitations. An uninsured person of low character ran a red light and t-boned her car a couple years back. She sustained several ‘life-ending’ injuries but miraculously survived. A family friend moved in with her to act as caregiver, but that arrangement is over. Now the choices are either a nur$ing home or moving in with us.

I am family oriented and believe institutions can be a horror, but I am not sure we are equipped to provide what she needs since wife and I both work full time. Anyone have experience caring for an aged parent and willing to share your advice? Thanks.

Not sure this is the right sub. My parents and father in law died long ago, RIP. Wife and I are looking for a new home and considering getting one large enough for us to invite her mother to live with us. She has physical limitations. An uninsured person of low character ran a red light and t-boned her car a couple years back. She sustained several ‘life-ending’ injuries but miraculously survived. A family friend moved in with her to act as caregiver, but that arrangement is over. Now the choices are either a nur$ing home or moving in with us. I am family oriented and believe institutions can be a horror, but I am not sure we are equipped to provide what she needs since wife and I both work full time. Anyone have experience caring for an aged parent and willing to share your advice? Thanks.

(post is archived)

[–] 2 pts

It would be the right thing to do imo, if you can make it work.

There are people that require 24/7 skilled care that are better off in nursing homes, but for a lot of older adults that is not the case.

You can usually get home healthcare from her medicare/medicaid to come into the home and help. Maybe stay with her while you are at work.

Usually the biggest consideration is, is she a fall risk? Can she toilet herself safely? Will she be able to feed herself lunch without burning the house down?

If you do try it. I'd explain to her that it is a trial, but in the end if it isn't safe, you will have to look at other options.

[–] 2 pts

Not a likely fall risk, but who knows. She can handle her bathroom needs and her medicine regimen. I wholeheartedly agree that we all must accept this is a trial.

[–] 2 pts

I'd say go for it then. At least that way if it doesn't work all parties will know you tried. If you put her in the home, there might be regretful thoughts of, "what if we would have just kept her home".